Immunity
by Rachelizabeth1224
Summary: He thinks she's mysterious. She thinks he's full of crap. Pony/Jill x Skye. Rated T for language.
1. Chapter 1: Feisty

**A/N: I know it's not hot snot on a silver platter or anything, but not bad for a first Fanfic, eh? I decided it was about time to stop stalking other people's Fanfics, and so I decided to write my own. It's a little cliché, but I tried to my put my own spin on it, which is quite an accomplishment considering I am completely left-brained and have the creativity of a walrus on crack. But enough of my lame attempts at humor. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Obviously, I do not own Natsume, Harvest Moon, etc etc.**

"Romana is going to kill me!" I whined, glancing at my watch as I sprinted past the Blue Bar. I was supposed to be at the mansion at 10:00 PM sharp to help her and Sebastian plan a birthday party for Lumina, but was sidetracked by a certain pathetic excuse for a musician who was somehow convinced that I was interested in listening to his bird calls. _Stupid hippie_.

Dirt flying from my heels, I rounded the corner and, using the last few ounces of strength I possessed after a particularly long and frustrating day of farming, bounded up the familiar stairs leading towards the manor. _I must be a train wreck, _I thought, plopping down on the fountain's edge and viewing my reflection in the water. I frantically combed my fingers through what used to be an acceptable ponytail in a weak attempt to tame it. With an exhausted sigh, I realized that it was pointless trying to fix my appearance without proper supplies; I was beyond fixing. Maybe Lumina would be willing to lend me a hand? She was always up for a challenge, especially when it came to fashion, and as long as it didn't involve breaking a sweat or, more importantly, a nail…

A loud crash, followed by a high-pitched shriek that I immediately recognized as Lumina's, broke into my thoughts, causing me to jump at least mile into the air in the process. After resting a moment to allow my heart to reboot, I stumbled to my feet and strode uncertainly towards the towering double doors, assuming that Lumina encountered another spider and threw a vase at it or something. I smiled, remembering her mortification of being within a mile of anything that crawled.

As I reached towards the doorbell, the door suddenly sprang open, knocking the breath out of me and sending me sprawling across the lawn. Ouch. _This is _really_ gonna hurt in the morning,_ I thought in dismay, tenderly rubbing the already-forming black and blue marks along my arms. I looked up, shooting invisible daggers with my eyes at the dark figure that emerged from the offending door.

"Why don't you watch where you're going next time? " I snapped irritably at the unknown person. "I bruise easily."

"My apologies. I had no intentions of harming a maiden tonight, especially one as breathtakingly beautiful as you." A smooth voice replied. "Though I suppose casualties must occur eventually when one takes up a profession such as mine. Still, I do not take pleasure in them."

The figure took a step forward into the dim light of the lampposts, where I could now barely see their face. After contemplating for a few moments, I decided that the person's features were more masculine than feminine, though, to be honest, it was hard to tell. After all, no normal guy would grow his hair out past his shoulders, straighten it, and then dye it silver. And I'm no fashion guru, but I'm pretty sure any woman let alone _man_ with a shred of dignity wouldn't be caught dead in a silk cheetah print top.

"Who _are_ you?" I questioned, studying the mysterious face.

"I am quite the ladies' man, in case you haven't already noticed, and a prince of the stars." He replied coolly, flashing me a mysterious half smile.

At that moment, I heard the loud click-clacking of high heels echoing down the staircase from inside, and the "prince of the stars" and I turned to face the sound. Lumina came barreling out of the mansion, her breath coming in short gasps. She bent over, panting, and rested her hands on her knees.

"Hey… you! Aren't you… that thief… who warns… his victims… ahead of time?" She questioned, out of breath.

_Thief?_ I thought. _What kind of a thief warns his victims ahead of time? Even I know that's not a good idea, and the most practice in thieving I've ever had was stealing cookies from the cookie jar when I was a toddler!_

"Hmm. It appears I've been found out. A clever woman you are… Lumina, wasn't it? And beautiful, as well. You don't see that very often in a woman."

Lumina squealed and her face flushed beet red. She turned to me excitedly and started babbling.

"He called me beautiful! Did you hear that? _The _Phantom Thief called me beautiful! What a smooth talker he is! I can't wait to tell Rock! He'll be, like, so jealous! I wonder if he'll even believe me? I'm going to get my camera, just in case! Pony, Phantom Thief, stay right there!"

She squealed again, this time louder, and flitted back up the staircase.

"Hehe. An energetic one, that Lumina is, and quite pretty, too," The Phantom Thief remarked, subtly inching closer to me. "Of course, her beauty is nothing in comparison to yours."

I rolled my eyes. "Cut it out, alright? This whole "look at me I'm all beautiful and mysterious" smooth talking crap just isn't gonna work on me, and I have no plans to turn you in anyways, so you might as well just leave and take your inflated ego with you before I suffocate."

He cocked his head to one side, studying me. Finally, he responded, "Hmm. Feisty. I like that in a woman." He winked.

I groaned. Was he that oblivious? Once again, I heard the click-clack of high heels down the stairs.

"Unfortunately, it appears I'm a bit pressed for time," The thief said calmly and without emotion, motioning towards the door. "I'm about to jet out, but don't worry, we'll meet again. It's in the stars."

"Oh no, you don't," yelled Lumina's voice from the doorway. "I haven't gotten my picture yet! Say cheese!"

"Hehe. Hold up, beautiful. Don't let such raw anger steal away your beauty." The Prince of the Stars replied with a practiced ease.

I thought Lumina was going to explode at the rate that the blood was rushing to her face.

Instead, she fainted.

"It seems as though she, like most women, was not immune to my charms," He said simply, and, throwing me a meaningful glance, added, "Perhaps one day, the maiden of my dreams will also find me irresistible."

"Keep dreaming, pretty boy." I snickered, and started my descent down the stairs.

**A/N: Review? Pretty please with sugar on top? *Gives googly eyes* **

**At first, I was thinking of keeping it a one-shot, but considering I have no social life whatsoever and am currently tormenting the Windstream man who came to fix my mom's computer for fun, I might add a few more chapters. Whaddya think?**


	2. Chapter 2: Torture Device

**A/N: Only three reviews? *Sighs* I know you stalkers can do better than that! Anyhoo, second chapter is done. Enjoy!**

"Blegh! Get off of me, you stupid mutt!" I complained, instinctively throwing the covers up and sending my frightened dog scampering across the room. I wiped the dog saliva off of my face with the sleeve of my PJs, making a disgusted face. _Ah, the joys of being a dog owner._

I grabbed a rice ball from the pantry and ventured outside of my barely-fit-for-intelligent-life hut, slinging my Rucksack over my left shoulder.

When I'd told Takakura how I could barely fit my pinky toe, let alone myself and my pets, into the dwarf-sized midget of a shack, he'd merely told me that my parents could do it, so I could too. _My parents_. The word still stung, even though I'd lost my family over a year ago. Huh. I thought I'd be over them after all this time but, unfortunately, that wasn't the case.

I gazed out over the almost-empty land that was now mine and thought about what I'd do with it all. I already had Gotz build a chicken coop and I'd plowed a small field which I planned on planting turnips in, but that wasn't nearly enough. Maybe I could plant a few trees or something…

"Hey, sister!" came an all-too-familiar voice from behind me. I grunted in response, hoping the hippie would notice I wasn't in the mood and leave me be. My hopes were murdered.

"It's such a beautiful day today," he rejoiced, staring dreamily at the sky. "It's all so amazing, isn't it? In fact, I wrote a song about it… Want to hear?"

Despite my lack of response and occasional evil glares, Gustafa proceeded to make my ears bleed through over thirty badly sung verses about how much he enjoyed watching the trees photosynthesize. The guy was a more effective torture device than anything the people in the Medieval Times could've come up with.

_Two hours later…_

I have done the impossible.

I have convinced that oblivious hippie to get the hell off my farm. For a few days, at least.

"Hey, Gustafa," I'd interrupted him mid-verse, "There's this one person that I know that I've noticed has seemed a little… depressed lately. What can I do to help him out?"

As expected, he'd replied, "He can't let the man bring him down. Music is the perfect cure for the soul, sister. Remember that. Play them a tune, and it'll brighten up their day."

"Oh no! I'm no good at singing, and I can't play any instruments either. Whatever will I do, Gustafa?" I'd wailed theatrically.

I'd concluded that there were two possible responses, one more desirable than the other.

Response #1: "I'll teach ya, sister! Before you know it, you'll be feelin' the power of song flowing through your veins."

Response #2: "I shall help you, my sister! I can't possibly let a fellow human being be subjected to such dark thoughts. Who is this person in need?"

Fortunately for me, he chose option two. For if he'd chosen option number one, I'd have a murder on my hands, and I'd prefer not to spend the rest of my life in a jail cell even if it is more spacious than my current lodgings.

"To be honest, I don't know his actual name, but he's known around here as The Phantom Thief," _What the heck? _I'd thought. _Gustafa'll probably never find him, but I'd love to see the look on that cross-dressing thief's face when he encounters this particular walking musical disaster._

"He's usually here only at night. At least, that's the only time I've ever seen him. Lumina seems to have a bit of thing for him, so why don't you go ask her where he might be found?" I rambled, crossing my fingers that he'd take the bait.

He did.

"Thanks, sister. I think I will. Catch you on the flip side!" He called over his shoulder, already skipping merrily towards the farm's exit, humming the dreaded song.

_Stupid hippie._

**A/N: Wow. I never realized how hard it was to write dialogue for Gustafa! O_O Sorry if he's a little OCC.**

**I'm leaving for Florida in a few hours (Woot woot!) so I probably won't be able to write another chapter till I get back on the 18th. I'm crossing my fingers that I can at least finish chapter 3 before I go, but I make no promises ;)**

**The review button's really close to your cursor… *Wink wink nudge nudge***


	3. Chapter 3: Modesty

"Thanks, Vesta!" I said cheerfully as I paused at the door, depositing the newly purchased seeds into my rucksack.

"No problem, kiddo. Just don't work yerself to death now, ya hear? I did once when I was just a little thing, and had to listen to Dr. Hardy drone on and on about good health for _days_! The guy can run his mouth even longer than Marlin when you ask about his ancestors!" Her warm, booming, laughter filled her tiny shop, and I grinned in response.

Marlin, on the other hand, looked as if he was about to blow a gasket.

I'd grown really fond of Vesta in my short time at Forget-Me-Not Valley. She somehow always knew how to bring a smile to my face, and there was always a warm bed to sleep in should I ever need it. She was like a fourth mother to me.

You see, my actual blood-related mother died giving birth to me. My father remarried a year or so later, assuming that I needed a female role model in my life. This was the woman I acknowledged as "Mom" up until I was 11. At that point, both of them died in a tragic mini-golfing accident. Don't ask. Child services, of course, came to relocate me, and I ended up with a foster family in Mineral Town. A few years after that, my new parents died of a nasty case of Swine Flu that was going around. That's when I moved to the valley, on the same farm my real mother and father used to live on.

"Hey, Pony Girl!" I heard a rough voice call enthusiastically as I emerged from the shop.

"Kai?" I asked hopefully, surveying my surroundings. It was already too dark to tell for sure who the person was. "Is that you?"

"Nope, it's Bobo the magic pickle here to sing showtunes and dance the can-can. Who else?"

I knew my foster brother's sarcasm anywhere.

"Kai!" I chirped, and sprinted head on into him, sending us both tumbling down the dirt path and into the river in a tangled heap.

"Well hello there!" He laughed, tusseling my wet hair. "So, how's the farming thing going?"

"Eh... I wouldn't call it "farming" just yet, considering I just now bought my first bag of seeds," I said guiltily, holding up my newest purchase. "How's the restaurant thing going?"

"Things've been better," he answered, an amused grin tugging at the corners of his mouth. "Rick always thinks I'm hitting on his sister, right? So he keeps trying to find something wrong with my food so he can scare all the customers away to get back at me. Just last week, he claimed that I tried to poison his snow cone with toilet cleaner!" We both chuckled.

"Hey, I was actually just on my way to the beach to try out my new fishing rod. Wanna come?" I knew how much Kai loved the beach. Back when we were kids, I had to drag him kicking and screaming from the ocean just to get him to eat once in a while!

"You kiddin' me? Do you know who you're talkin' to? Race ya there!"

At that moment, I heard the annoying beep of my cell phone as I recieved a new text. Flipping it open, I saw it was from Muffy.

_Come 2 the bar ASAP. Emergency!_

An exhausted sigh escaped my lips. Couldn't I at least have one moment of peace and quiet in this stupid town? I started to explain to Kai that our race would have to be on hold for now, but my brother was nowhere in sight. I'd just have to go without him.

I dragged myself out of the river, wringing out my ponytail as I shuffled self-consciously to the Blue Bar. Why did I have to pick today of all days to wear a white shirt?

I heard a wolf whistle from behind and whirled around angrily to see none other than Rock, the village idiot, checking me out. If looks could kill, he would've been dead on the spot.

"Hey, baby, If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together."

Pick up lines? _Really_? How lame could you get? I could tell that he was trying to smooth talk me, but he sounded more like

he was constipated than anything else.

"If _I _could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put F and U together." I snapped.

The look on his face was priceless. I couldn't resist; I held up my cell phone and snapped a picture before I twirled around gracefully and continued on my way. _Looks like I'm gonna have a new screensaver._

"Thank goddess you're here, Pony!" Muffy blubbered as I approached the bar, throwing her arms around my neck and sobbing into my shoulder. I patted her back awkwardly, trying to comfort her.

"Got here as fast as I could. What's going on, Muffy? It better be good."

"We got a notice from Phantom Skye," She sniffled, her voice shaking from the tears that welled up in her dark green eyes. The blood drained from my face. _Not _him_ again! _"Come inside; Griffin still has the note he left. Hurry!"

I trailed after the blonde bartender and collapsed onto the nearest barstool, propping my head up with my elbows. Glancing up, I tried to catch the zoned-out bartender's eye, but he was in sort of a trance, staring at a small scrap of paper as if it had just burst into flames.

"So," I said conversationally, trying to break into his trance. "Whatcha got there?"

He startled, and his cheeks turned a bright scarlet as he took in my sopping wet form.

"Erm... A note. From... The Phantom Thief."

"And?"

"Pardon?" He questioned, still rudely gawking at me.

"What does it say?" I growled, losing patience.

"Oh... right, of course," Griffin stuttered, his face turning an ever deeper shade of red. "'I'm going to bless your bar with my presense at midnight for a drink. Phantom Skye.' Hmph. He certainly _does_ love himself. He really should show some modesty."

He huffed, his face beginning to turn back to its unnatural pasty-white color.

"Phantom Skye _does_ seem really confident, though, sending a note in advance like that and everything. I kind of like that in a guy." Muffy stole a sideways glance at Griffin, subtly hinting at the true meaning behind her words.

"Either way, he's still a dirty thief, and we should corner him for the safety of the valley." Griffin grunted, trying to hide his jealously towards the silver-haired thief.

"Yeah!" Agreed the blonde. "If he wants a drink, he'll have to pay for it like the rest of us! Right, Pony?"

I smacked my forehead. She was having a blonde moment.

"Er... That's not exactly what I meant, but I suppose so," Griffin remarked, somehow managing to not become impatient with his slow co-worker.

Muffy's eyes lit up as she thought of something, and she started to bounce up and down excitedly, a wide grin appearing on her lips. "Hey, Pony, are you doing anything tonight? We could, like, really use your help with catching that arrogant thief. We could even have a sleepover afterwards and give each other makeovers and stuff! Please, please, please, please, please?"

I groaned. I was definately not into the whole "sleepover" thing, and I certainly didn't want to be within 10 feet of that obnoxious self-centered criminal, but I felt guilty leaving the pair alone to deal with him. Neither seemed to be the fighting type.

Just as I was about to give a response, the strong odor of curry drifted through the bar. I wrinkled my nose in disgust. Even the smell of the spicy dish made me want to vomit ever since I got food poisoning from it once in Kindergarden.

"Mmm... Is that curry I smell?" Muffy asked eagerly, closing her eyes and inhaling deeply. "I absolutely _love _curry!"

Griffin stroked his jaw. "Yes... I believe you're right, Muffy. It smells delicious. I wonder where it's coming from?"

The two wandered curiously towards the front door, appearing as if they were going to leave. I threw myself in their path trying to block their way, but they merely brushed me aside as if I were a bothersome housefly and kept on walking.

"Uhh... guys? The thief is gonna be here in, oh, 10 seconds or less, so I don't think it would be very smart to-"

I was interrupted by a loud _thud _as the door slammed in my face.

"Leave." I finished. _I'm outta here, _I thought. _It's their own fault if they get robbed. Not my problem._

I reached for the doorknob, and again was sent sprawling across the room. I hopped to my feet immeadiately, infuriated. _Why does he keep doing this to me?_

"Hehe. And so we meet again, my darling Pony. I told you it would happen, did I not?"

I merely pressed my lips into a hard line and gave him the death stare, imagining what it would be like to break his scrawny neck.

"Do you believe it is fate that has drawn us together once again?"

"Could it be fate?" I purred seductively, wiping the evil look off of my face and replacing it with a mischevious smile. Slowly, I crossed the room until I was just inches from his feminine face.

"Hehe. I knew it. I am glad to hear that from such a beautiful maiden." Skye leaned forward in anticipation and closed his eyes, assuming that I was trying to get close enough to kiss him. He was wrong. Very wrong.

I slapped him with all of the force I posessed, which was a considerable amount if I do say so myself. I was no wuss. He looked injured for a split second, then quickly regained his usual cool composure, raising one eyebrow.

"Still as hot-tempered as I remember, I see. I was curious as to why you'd given in so easily without a fight. You've become quite the little actress. But no matter. You will surrender to my charm eventually. That, too, is in the stars."

He gazed at me longingly with his emerald eyes, as if I were a precious gem worth millions. I scowled back at him, as if he had just set me on fire. We stayed this way for at least five minutes, neither of us shifting our gazes. He finally shook his head, dazed, as if coming back to the present.

"Anyways, would you be so kind as to hold still for just a moment longer? I'm truly sorry about this, but it must be done."

I stared at the thief blankly, cocking my head slightly to one side, wondering what the hell he was talking about.

"Chick-Beam... Fire!" He yelled, his eyes full of regret.

I stiffened at once, and my hands fell to my sides. It was as if someone had gorilla-glued my joints together. I squirmed, trying desperately to break free of whatever spell he was casting, but to no avail. I was trapped. A smirk appeared on his already smug face.

"Hehe. Just relax, Pony. You'll be able to move in a while. I promise."

I struggled again, trying in vain to break free of my invisible chains.

"Don't you trust me?"

"Of course I do," I said dryly, my voice dripping with sarcasm. "You only hit me with a door. _Twice. _Then, you proceed to freeze me with some kind of a weird magic trick. Lastly, you're a conniving thief who has stolen from my friends on multiple occasions and will most likely do so again in the future. Why shouldn't I trust you?"

"My point exactly," he answered, his tone just as snarky as mine.

He casually strolled to the back of the bar as if he owned the place, and began to examine the labels on some of the bottles.

"Skye?" I asked idly.

"Hmm?"

"Why are you a thief?"

The Phantom Thief said nothing for a while, and I began to think he was not going to give me an answer.

"That's an odd question" was his only reply.

"Maybe so, but what's the answer?"

"...I don't know why."

"But there _must_ be a reason," I persisted. "Is it just for fun or what?"

"That might be it. That might _not_ be it..." He furrowed his brow in thought, and after a moment a triumphant smile lit up his face. "You want to know more about me don't you?"

I rolled my eyes. "No way! I was asking you these personal questions about yourself for some other reason."

He chuckled. "And I'd love to answer them. But, if I did, if I simply _told_ you, it would take all of the mystique out of our current relationship."

"_Relationship_? And which _relationship_ would that be, exactly?"

He again chuckled, and shook his head. "You misunderstand, Pony. I'll tell you what- if you somehow manage to capture me, then I'll tell you everything you want to know. Deal?"

"I'd shake your hand, but it's kind of frozen to my ass."

He smiled, amused at my response, and wagged his finger at me as if I were a misbehaving child. "Language, my lovely Pony. And I will take that as a yes."

"That's odd. Could've sworn that smell was coming from Kai's stand, but I guess not..." Came a muffled voice from outside.

"Yep. Same here. I wonder what it was...?"

"Hehe. It appears once again that our time together is limited, so I must jet. We shall meet yet again, my love."

Skye tore himself away from the wine, selecting one of the most expensive-looking ones before sauntering slowly towards me, stopping inches from my face as I did to him minutes before.

"Could it be fate?" He asked, then stroked my cheek before moving out of my line of vision.

"Pony? Pony!" Came Muffy's worried voice from behind. "Oh my goddess! What happened to you?"

I explained to her the events of the previous hour, leaving out any part I saw fit. Which was pretty much the whole thing.

"The Phantom Thief was _here?_" She gasped in horror. Muffy immeadiately flitted over to the wine shelf, checking for any missing bottles. "It's true! The Okuhattan is gone! Oh, Griffin! That wine was worth a fortune!"

He sighed. "I know. Took me years to get a hold of it. But the most important thing is that you're alright, Pony."

"Yeah, totally! I'm so sorry I left you all alone, Pony! It was, like, _really_ irresponsible of me. Can you ever forgive me?"

I nodded, and stretched as the last of the Chick-Beam wore off.

"Get a good night's rest, Pony. You deserve it."

I nodded again sleepily, and set off towards home, rewinding the events of the night in my head.

_Stupid Thief._


	4. Chapter 4: Kodak Moment

**A/N: Another filler! Yipee! I can feel your excitement already! XD Sorry it's so short- I had absolutely no idea what to write in this chapter. Don't ya just love writer's block?**

I startled as I felt a hard tug at the end of my fishing pole. _Finally! _I eagerly reeled in the line as I had been instructed hours earlier, my mouth already watering at the prospect of having fish for dinner tonight. Because I'd gotten a late start farming this year and was pretty much broke, I'd been living off of Ramen Noodles for weeks. I almost would've eaten my own foot just to get a change in my diet.

"Nice catch," Kai snickered as I stared in disappointment at the old boot that I caught on my hook. "But I wouldn't quit my day job, if I were you."

"Shut up!" I snapped playfully, punching him lightly on the arm. "It was my first time! Gimme a break!"

"No can do. I'm your brother; it's my job."

"In that case, you deserve a promotion."

"Thank you, thank you very much!" he said, a perfect imitation of Elvis.

I laughed. It was nice to have my big brother home, even if it was only for the summer.

Kai checked his wristwatch, then suddenly packing up our fishing equipment.

"Hey, Pony, I gotta go. I'm supposed to meet some of the guys for a drink in a few. Catch ya later!"

"'Kay, see ya. Have fun."

I sighed sadly as soon as he was out of hearing distance. Kai's departure meant that I had to go work. Ugh. I had at least five fields worth of seeds that still needed to be planted, and my laundry wasn't going to do itself. The sun was already beginning to set and I hadn't even started.

I reluctantly climbed to my feet, brushing off the sand that stuck to the back of my shorts, and began the long hike from the beach to my farm. I made sure to avoid the yurt to my right, and instead took the left-hand path when I reached the crossroads.

"And what, exactly, do you think you're doing?" A silky, yet confused, voice asked from the direction I did not travel in.

I did not agknowledge the thief, thinking he was talking to me, and instead continued on my way, but a second voice made me freeze in my tracks.

"Brightening your day, man! Music calms the mind and soothes the soul, you know."

Oh goddess. Two of my least favorite people in the world in one place. I quickened my pace, eager to get away. _I gotta get out of here before they notice-_

"Pony? Is that you?" Gustafa questioned.

I cursed. _Why me?_

"No."

"Pony! It _is _you! Come over here, sister!" He called cheerfully, motioning for me to join him.

My shoulders drooped as I unwillingly lumbered to his front yard, wanting to avoid any later confrontations from the crazed hippie that might result from fleeing. I made sure to keep a safe distance from the pair, however, by standing at the bottom of the stairs leading to his home. Skye raised an eyebrow at me, motioning with his head towards the musician as if asking _Who the hell is this guy?_

A impish grin appeared on my face as I realized what was happening. _This is going to be fun._

Gustafa looked to me, and I gave him a reassuring smile. Skye was right- I was getting better at this acting thing. As soon as he turned his back to me to face the thief, I quickly grabbed two cotton balls from a first aid kit in my rucksack and stuffed them in my ears. Hopefully, it would reduce the pain and suffering a little.

Then, he pulled out his ukelele and began to play the dreaded notes that have starred in my nightmares for so long. The dude put Freddy Krueger to shame.

The Phantom Thief's eyes opened wide in shock, and looked as if they were about to pop out of his skull. His mouth hung open a little in disbelief. He attempted to regain his usual cool composure, but failed. Miserably. I savored this moment; I'd probably never see him lose his cool like this ever again. It was definately what you might call a "Kodak Moment". He tried to leave, but Gustafa blocked him, copying his every move like a mirror image. The Prince of the Stars looked to me in desperation, his eyes pleading. I almost felt sorry for the poor guy. Almost.

"Revenge is sweet!" I giggled and, having taken all I could of the song without shooting myself, continued the long hike back to my farm. It didn't matter anymore that I had work to do. This was the best day of my life.

**A/N: Wow. I really suck at writing fillers o_O Sorry, everyone! I tried! :'(**


	5. Chapter 5: Motivation

**A/N: Phew! This chapter is long! My brain hurts now :P Hope this one's better than the last!**

"Get the ball, Ringo! Come on, boy, I know you can do it!"

My dog cocked his head to the side and wagged his tail excitedly, staring up at me blankly with those big brown eyes. Encouragement wasn't working; time for Plan B.

"Go on, you good for nothing flea-bag! Fetch the damn ball!" I screamed in frustration. "It's not all that hard!"

"What seems to be the problem here?" Takakura questioned through his open window, having heard my outburst.

"_Him!_" I accused, pointing a finger at my innocent-looking canine.

"Who, Ringo? That pooch wouldn't hurt a fly."

I snorted. "Don't let him fool you! He's a demon in disguise! A demon, I tell you!"

He eyed me skeptically. "Right... Well, I'm going to get back to sleeping. So long, Pony."

"Ugh!" I cried out, venting my built up frustration by punting the accursed ball into next week. It shot up into the air with a _whoosh_, flying high over the trees that separated my property from the town until it was just a tiny speck in the morning sky.

I turned to Ringo. "You wouldn't, by any chance, want to fetch that, would you?"

In answer, he barked aggressively and warily backed into his dog house. _I'll take that as a no._

I began to climb through the growth outside of the forest, taking care to avoid anything that looked like poison ivy. I glanced around cautiously. This place was a lot bigger than I originally thought.

I hiked through the vines and growth that barred my way, leaving a path behind to follow back home. After several minutes of this, I collapsed to the ground in exhaustion, wiping the sweat from my face with the sleeve of my shirt. I'd come to the conclusion that I'd never find the ball; the forest was way too dense.

I heard the rushing of the waterfall up ahead. _Maybe I could stop for a quick drink? It's not like I have anything else to do today._

I rose from my sitting position and strode over to the lake that pooled in front of the waterfall, splashing the cool water on my face.

"Pony! You came at a good time!" I heard Carter yell from the other side of the lake. "Come over here for a minute, please."

"'Kay."

I ambled around the edge of the lake, coming dangerously close to falling in a few times but eventually crossing to the other side where the archaeologist's tent was set up.

"A note came from The Phantom Thief." Flora declared. "'At midnight, I'll be helping myself to the valuables in your tent. Phantom Skye.'"

"That two-bit, good-for-nothing, snake-in-the-grass _thief_!" Carter accused, upset over the possibility of losing any of his valuable artifacts.

"If he succeeds, we'll be set back for days!" The assistant determined. "We _have_ to stop him."

"I've got an idea. Pony, will you help us catch him? Maybe, it won't be so hard with the three of us working together."

"The last time I was asked this same question and agreed, I was hit with a door, insulted, stolen from, and frozen with a chick beam, whatever the hell that is. So thanks, but no thanks."

"Aww, come on, Pony!" Flora pleaded. "Would you really leave your poor friends defenseless against a heartless thief? Knowing that we could be in danger?"

I groaned. I was a sucker for guilt trips.

"Alright, alright, I'll help. But you guys owe me big time."

"Awesome! Thank you, Pony! Thank you so much!"

"Come see us in the tent between 10 and 12 tonight. In the meantime, you should go digging in the mines. Lots of valuables on the first floor, you know. They're worth a lot, I hear."

"Thanks, Carter. See ya!"

I headed for the mines, walking through the arch that led to the first floor. I swung my hoe at the ground, hunting for anything that was worth shipping. It was oddly addicting. After a few hours, I headed back towards the tent, my rucksack full of jewelry. _No more noodles for me!_

"Thanks again for coming, Pony. The thief isn't here yet, though." Carter checked the wall clock above his sleeping bag. "But he _should_ be here any minute now. He was supposed to be here over an hour ago, actually."

"Hmm. Maybe he just forgot about that note he sent?" Flora guessed.

I snorted. "I doubt it. He'd never give up the opportunity to steal from innocent people. It's what he does best, after all."

"You sound like you know him, Pony." Carter concluded, eying me suspiciously.

"Yeah, it does kinda sound like it. Well, do you?" Flora interrogated.

"Unfortunately. I think he's a stalker or something."

"Oh. I-I see," Carter faltered, ashamed at his accusation. "In that case... All the more reason to put that pervert behind bars!"

There was a slight rustling of leaves outside the tent. Carter screamed, hiding behind Flora and using her as a human shield.

Flora and I looked to each other, and burst out laughing.

"You scream like a girl, Carter!"

"N-Not funny. That could've been the Phantom Thief for all we know," Carter's eyes suddenly lit up in realization. "That's it! He's probably stealing goods from the dig site at this very moment! That dirty rotten thief!"

Flora's laughter abruptly came to a halt. She gasped in realization. "You're right! Pony, you stay here and watch the tent, and me and Carter'll check it out."

"No way!" I argued. "As soon as you leave, he's just gonna waltz right in, and hit me with a door, and chick beam me, and then steal something and jet before you guys get back! It's all part of his plan, don't you see?"

They shared a quick glane, then stared at me as if I'd gone insane. Before I could get another word out, they had escaped.

I thought about following, but I didn't feel like being pummeled by an inanimate object tonight, and so I just plopped down onto a sleeping bag and waited. I didn't have to wait for long.

"Hehe. I had a feeling we'd meet again tonight."

"Congratulations! For once, you didn't hit me with a door," I remarked. "Keep it up and maybe the freeze ray thing won't be so bad."

"Don't be nervous, beautiful. I won't be using my magic here. _If _you play nice." He winked.

I rolled my eyes. "For some strange reason, I don't believe you."

"I did send a note today, but I'm not here to steal anything. Any artifacts, at least."

"Oh? Then what is it you're after this time? A brain, I hope?"

He chuckled. "No, you silly girl. I came to see _you_. Steal you, to be more accurate."

"Shocker."

"Let's go somewhere else. Somewhere more private. Those two could be back any minute."

I sputtered. "Who says I'm going anywhere? I'm perfectly content here, thanks."

"Actually, you _are _coming with me," Skye corrected, a dangerous grin on his face. "Either you come quietly, or I _will_ use my Chick Beam tonight and carry you there by force. Your choice."

I gaped. "Are you threatening me?"

He smirked. "I say it's "motivation", but call it whatever you like."

"Alright, fine. You win this round. Lead the way before I change my mind and decide to break your face."

"This way, please, madam." Skye announced smugly, a triumphant smile on his lips. He reached for my hand, but I slapped his away, aiming a forceful kick at his shin. His features contorted in pain before again becoming a cool mask.

"Don't push your luck, pretty boy. Next time, that kick will be aimed a little higher."

"Point taken, my beautiful Pony. Stubborn, as always. Now follow me, if you will. We don't have all night, as much as I wish that were true."

Skye's hand twitched, as if he were going to try to hold my hand again, but he quickly realized that would be a bad idea. Instead, he gestured for me to follow him and began to lead the way, eventually coming to a halt on the beach, right on the ocean's edge. The thief lowered himself to the ground and stared out at the waves, a distant expression on his face.

"Hehe. The ocean is especially beautiful tonight, isn't it? But maybe it's just because you're by my side, Pony."

"Not that it wasn't a nice speech and all, but why, exactly, are you comparing my beauty to the fishes' toilet water?"

He chuckled. "Maybe that wasn't the best metaphor. But you're a very clever girl; I'm sure that you got the idea."

"Sorry, I'm broke," I apologized, turning my pockets inside out for him to see.

"Pardon me?" Skye questioned, a small crease appearing on his forehead as he processed the meaning of my words.

"I said 'I'm broke', meaning that I don't have enough gold to purchase whatever you're trying to sell to me."

He shrugged. "I am merely pointing out the obvious. Besides, I am a thief, not a salesman. Though you have to admit I'd make a good one."

I laughed. I had to agree with him on this one. Skye could probably get 99.9% of all girls to buy a jumbo can of Spam if he wanted to.

"May I just say that you look simply ravishing when you laugh?" Seeing my murderous glare, he added, "Please do not break my face. Again, I was merely stating the truth."

"And I am merely stating the truth when I say that one more slip like that and your face will be the least of your worries."

"You don't mean that," he snickered. "You're bluffing."

"Maybe I am, maybe I'm not, but do you really wanna find out?"

There was a long pause. Feeling awkward, I took a seat next to him on the sand, wrapping my hands around my knees.

"So... Does this qualify as catching you?" I wondered, trying to break the awkward silence.

"It depends. Define 'catching'."

"The other day, you said that if I caught you, I could ask you anything I wanted."

"Mmm. I suppose I did. What did you have in mind?"

"I'm just curious... What do you do when you're not, y'know, stealing?"

He pursed his lips, debating whether or not to confide in me. "I pride myself in making curry."

_Ew._ I thought, almost tossing my cookies then and there.

"But I can never seem to make the curry I'm going for," The thief went on. "I've got the right flavor and all, but it still seems like I'm missing something. Something important."

"Have you tried cooking with love?" I offered.

Skye's head snapped up to look at me, one eyebrow raised.

"Hey, don't look at me like that!" I argued defensively. "I saw it once on this cheesy cooking show my mom was obsessed with."

"Hehe. Love..." His voice trailed off as he considered my suggestion. "You might actually be on to something. I've been so focused on the flavor that I never really thought about it." The Phantom Thief turned to me, his eyes grateful. "Thanks, Pony. I hope you'll try my curry the next time I make some."

This time, I _did _toss my cookies.

"Goddess, Pony! You're sick!" He exclaimed. "Why didn't you tell me you weren't feeling well?"

I was feeling extremely generous tonight, so I left out the minor detail that he was the one responsible for my illness in the first place.

"I-I felt fine earlier. Must be a stomach virus or something."

"I am very sorry that you aren't feeling well," Skye remarked, for once sounding genuine. "I'd walk you home, but a nice girl such as yourself shouldn't be caught out with a thief."

His eyes were full of sympathy as he stood and walked out of sight, leaving me sitting alone on the beach. I didn't feel well enough to go back to the dig site tonight, so I flipped open my cell phone to text Flora before I headed home to get some shut eye.

_Sorry I left. Wasn't feeling well. No sign of the thief- You were right, he probably forgot._

_-Pony_

**A/N: As usual, review :DD**

**And to CanYouSeexILHARVESTMOON- Where are these cookies that you speak of? I'm hungry! ;)**


	6. Chapter 6: Compromise

**A/N: Yay! 500 hits! Woot! :D This chapter's not as good as the last one, but I hope you guys enjoy it anyways! ;)**

"Thanks again for watching Kate," Grant mumbled dully. "I'll be home an hour or two."

"Any time." I answered cheerfully, even though I was looking forward to babysitting just about as much as I looked forward to squirting lemon juice in my eyes.

I turned to the tiny girl, who started to raid the fridge the moment her father stepped through the door.

"So, Kate. What do you want to do? Do you have any dolls or anything that you want to play with?"

Kate twirled around to face me, a scowl contorting her childish features.

"Lookie here, Horsey, or Donkey, or whatever your name is," she spat. "You may _think _you're in charge here, just 'cause you're a few years older than me, but you're _wrong_!" The child stamped her foot, the telltale sign of a temper tantrum.

I smiled tolerantly. From my past experiences, most children acted like this when they were sleepy. "Looks like someone needs a nap," I flipped open my cell phone to check the time. "9:36. It's almost your bedtime, anyways. Go upstairs and get yourself dressed in your PJs; I'll be there to tuck you in soon."

"Maybe you are so thick that you didn't understand me the first time, lady, but you're not the one in charge here. _I _am! _Me_!"

"And what makes you think that?" I questioned, playing along.

"This," Kate grinned devilishly before knocking a picture frame off of a table, scattering broken shards of glass on the floor.

"Kate! Why'd you do that? Your father will be so disappointed in you!" I scolded.

"Oh, father!" she cried, her face now so innocent that even I believed her for a moment. "I only asked her if she would please make me something to eat, for my stomach was growling and I was oh so hungry, and she went _mad!_ She broke the picture of mother and me, and then she tried to hurt me!"

I was stunned. How could such a cute, innocent, little girl be almost as cunning as me? I'd heard stories from her past babysitters and, though I didn't believe them at first, I came prepared.

"Lookie here Horsey, or Donkey, or whatever your name is,'" the recording on my cell phone growled. "'You may _think _you're in charge here, just 'cause you're a few years older than me, but you're _wrong!'"_

The child's face grew paler with each word.

"You're smarter than I gave you credit for, Horsey," she admitted reluctantly, a grudging admiration in her mahogany eyes. "Alright, we'll compromise. I'll take the blame for the picture frame if you keep that recording to yourself. Deal?" She held out her tiny hand and, for a moment, I was reminded of when Skye and I made that deal at the bar a few nights ago.

"I'd shake your hand, but it's kind of frozen to my ass."

Her eyes grew wide as she took in my vulgar language. "Umm... _What?_"

"I said, 'I'll shake your hand, but I have really bad gas.'" I invented.

"Ew! Yuck!" Kate squealed, retracting her hand and retreating to the other side of the room. "There's Beano in the pantry. Help yourself! Don't be a stranger!"

I held in a laugh as I strode confidantly to the little girl in the corner. "Nah. I'm good."

"Ahh! Get away from me, you _freak!_"

I entertained myself in this way for the remaining hour. It was very amusing tormenting this small child, as much as I hated to admit it.

"Kate? Pony?" A lackluster voice piped up. "How was your night? Did my little pumpkin have a good time?"

"Oh father! It was miser-" I raised one eyebrow at her, reaching into my purse to retrieve my cell phone and holding it up for her to see.

"It was incredible! We had a blast!" Kate jabbered excitedly. Then, in a voice too low for Grant to hear, "Literally."

A small smile lit up his usually boring face. "I'm very happy to hear that. Thank you for helping out tonight, Pony. I appreciate it."

"No problemo, Mr. G. It was fun hanging out with your daughter. She's so darn cute!"

I was about to leave, but couldn't resist sticking my tongue out at the annoying kid one last time as soon as Grant turned his back.

Whistling to myself, I pranced proudly back to my farm, a spring in my step. However, what I saw there made me freeze in my tracks.

A wild dog was sniffing around the chicken coop, his neon yellow eyes lighting up the darkness between us. Takakura was right; I should've tried harder to train my dumb dog.

The empty chicken coop forgotten, the dog stalked slowly in my direction, the smell of fresh meat making him ravenous. I started panicking. _Am I supposed to play dead, or scare him off, or what? _I thought frantically. It's times like these that I wish I would've paid attention in Survival 101 back in Girl Scouts. Or at least brought a really big stick.

Lost in thought, I hadn't noticed that the animal had suddenly disappeared from my sight. I also hadn't noticed that he was now crouched on all fours behind me, the hackles on his back raised, preparing the attack. I did notice, however, a stabbing pain on the back of my neck, and the blackness that swallowed every one of my coherent thoughts until I drifted into a dreamless slumber.

**A/N: Ooooh, cliffhanger!**

**As always, review please! :P**

**I'll try to get the next chapter finished by tomorrow night :)**


	7. Chapter 7: Bluffing

**A/N: Curse you, Microsoft Word, for taking away my free trial! *shakes fist* Sorry it took longer than I thought to update- I lost most of this chapter and had to rewrite it on WordPad (A.K.A. crap)**

The chiming of a grandfather clock brought me back to reality, of all things. _One chime... Two... Three..._ So it was three o' clock. In the afternoon, or in the morning? I was very disoriented this morning/afternoon for some reason. More so than usual, even for me. I sat up and shook my head to try to clear my thoughts, to remember what was going on. Bad idea. A searing pain in my neck made me yelp in agony, and plop back on to the pillows that were propping up my head. _When did they get here? I usually only sleep with one pillow..._

"Pony! Are you awake? Are you all right? Can you speak? Goddess damn it, Pony, answer me!"

My eyes flew open wide. I was not expecting to hear Skye's silky voice, especially in such a panic, and certainly not in my own home. I screamed, and threw the nearest object towards the sound of his voice, which happened to be an expensive-looking vase on the bedside table. _Huh. I don't remember buying that._ I heard it shatter against the wall. _Crap! He must've ducked._

"You sicko! You _creep!_ Get out of my house _now!_" I shrieked, infuriated. _And to think I was actually warming up to the guy!_

"Dearest Pony, please! Give me a moment to explain! I promise you, no, I _swear _to you, that I mean you no harm!"

I mulled it over for a moment. He _had _been pretty good at keeping his promises lately. "Alright, Skye," I said grudgingly between gritted teeth. "You've got about 10 seconds to explain what the hell you're doing here before I hit you so hard that geologists will have to add a new number to the Mohs Hardness Scale."

Knowing that I did not usually make hollow threats, the thief began to quickly explain the reason why he was in my house, or, as I soon found out, why _I_ was in _his_. "I traveled to your home to check on you, to make sure your ailment was no more than a virus. I was very concerned after seeing you in such a state a few weeks ago and-"

"Woah, slow down. Did you say a few _weeks? _You're telling me that I've been zonked out for _weeks?_"

He smiled sadly, relieved that there was a topic change not involving him being beaten to a pulp by a girl. "Yes, I am. As I was saying, I approached your house to check on you, but was very surprised when I found you not inside, but passed out on the ground. Thinking that you had merely fainted from exhaustion, I began to carry you into your house." he grimaced, remembering something I assumed was about the memory that he hadn't yet mentioned.

"You _picked me up?_" I choked. "And just who do you think you are?"

"Your savior," he smirked, resorting back to his cocky self.

My hands balled up into fists, turning my knuckles a pale white. If I could move, he'd be dead right about now. I wanted to wipe that smirk off of his girly face so bad.

"If I were you, I would not kill me just yet," he added calmly, noticing my sudden flare of anger. "I have not finished my story yet, and I would not be able to do so if I were in the hospital for the rest of my life, now would I?"

I relaxed, though his cockiness flared my anger even more. "Go on."

"As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted," he continued as I childishly stuck my tongue out at him, "I picked you up off of the ground, and carried you into your house. As soon as I entered, I laid you down on your bed to rest. However, I felt something wet on the back of my hand. Upon closer examination, I realized that the substance was blood. _Your _blood, to be more precise. I discovered that there was a severe wound on the back of your neck that desperately needed to be treated, and assumed that you must have collapsed from blood loss, not exhaustion. Knowing that I could not help you at your home, for if I was discovered I'd be immediately apprehended, I took you to my house, where you remained unconscious for two weeks. And then you woke up and threw a vase at my head."

There was a long silence as I processed the information. I had been unconscious for weeks. I was saved by Phantom Skye. I was not in my own house, but his. And I broke his vase.

I grinned, realizing that I had runied what was probably one of his most expensive possessions. I enjoyed causing him pain, as bad as that may sound. My good mood quickly evaporated, however, when I realized that I was now in his debt.

Goddess help me. I was in the debt of Phantom Skye. I began to consider the best way to kill myself. Fire? Starvation? Drowning? Anything would be better than having him realize that I owed him.

"Not to sound rude, my lovely Pony, but I do believe that you owe me a debt, considering I saved your life."

_Damn. He realized it._ "Be happy that I don't knock you into next week for that one. But I'll humor you. What do you want?"

I'd regret asking that one. I should've known better. It was stupid of me. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

"A kiss from the most beautiful maiden in the world should suffice." He declared as coolly as if he were asking how my day was.

"Did you seriously just ask me what I think you just asked me? Cause if you did, believe me when I say that you'll be lucky to live to see another day."

"If, by that, you mean if I asked you to kiss me, then the answer is yes. And you are bluffing about the second part. I used to be an avid gambler, you see, and I know when someone is lying."

"In that case, I'd rather hitchhike naked in the middle of a snowstorm with Gustafa stapled to my elbow than kiss the sorry likes of _you_. And believe me when I say that I am _not_ lying!" I snapped irritably, though my confidence was beginning to waver. Was he right? _Did_ I want to kiss this obnoxious, self-loving, cross-dresser? I was pretty sure that the answer was an outstanding no, but with these damn teenage hormones telling me otherwise, it was hard to tell.

"Hmm. I have to admit that I rather like that image. Minus the Gustafa part, of course. Honestly, he makes me nervous."

"You did _not _just go there!" I snarled. "When I'm through with you, it'll hurt so much that your children will say 'Ow'!"

"You mean _our _children." he smirked.

"I wouldn't go making assumptions like that if I were you. In a few minutes, you won't have anything to make children _with!_"

"Maybe so. _If _you could move, that is, which I highly doubt."

_Shit._ He was right again. _How did he _know_?_

"Hehe. This qualifies as catching me, you know."

"Huh?"

"I was under the impression that there was another question you wanted to ask me on the beach a few weeks ago before you...er... became ill."

"Yeah, but then you spouted some crap about how it would take the mystique out of our 'current relationship', as you called it."

"Hmm. I suppose I did. But now is the perfect time to take our relationship to a new level."

"If you mean take our relationship from wanting to throw you under a moving bus to wanting to stab you repeatedly with a sharpened butcher knife, then I'm all for it."

"Someone's feeling awfully murderous tonight, or should I say this morning? Rest, for now, my Sleeping Beauty. When you awaken, and are less hot-tempered, I shall show you why I steal."

As if on cue, my eyelids started to droop. _Damn it! He must've drugged me! _

And that was the last thing I remembered before I dozed off.

**A/N: Woohoo! 211 more hits... And only .009% of you reviewed. I'm disappointed in you all ;)**

**CanYouSeexILHARVESTMOON: *Looks sadly at empty plate* I can has more cookies for this chapter? :3**


	8. Chapter 8: Hypothetical

**A/N: I have now officially mastered the art of Wordpad. However, being the piece of crap that it is, it doesn't come with a spell check, so please excuse my atrocious spelling/grammar in some places. Thanks :D**

I absolutely _hate_ being injured. With a passion. People always take pity on me, and then try to console me, and take care of me, and pretty much treat me like I'm five again. But that's not the main reason I hate it. Not anymore, at least. Now, I hate being injured because I can't clobber a certain overconfident thief when he starts to get cocky. It was actually becoming sort of a hobby.

Though my Skye-flogging days were on hold until I was fully healed, that didn't mean I would show any more weakness than I had to by wallowing in bed all day like a sissy.

Casting my hands out to both sides as support, I carefully lifted my torso from the bed, trying my best to keep my head still_. So far, so good._ I slid my legs across the cotton sheets until they were dangling from the edge, several inches from the wooden floor, and dropped. I managed to stifle a scream as the force from hitting the hard ground slightly jerked my head forward, and took my first few steps in what was supposedly two weeks. My legs felt like Jell-O, and not the thick pudding kind.

I hobbled awkwardly in a circle, searching for a door. I strolled towards the first one I saw, but upon opening it realized that it was Skye's closet. To my dismay, but not surprise, it was filled with row after row of the same silk cheetah print outfit, just in different colors. I'd really have to take him shopping sometime- his fashion sense was worse than mine, and that was truly saying something.

I left his closet alone for the time being, and this time managed to find the correct door. I advanced down a hallway, examining the gorgeous paintings that adorned the walls as I walked. _They're all_ _stolen, no doubt._

Eventually, the hall ended and I came into a small kitchen, where I was hit with the enticing sizzle of bacon like a ton of bricks. Skye was standing at the stove busily adding a variety of spices to the pan, his back turned to me.

"Hehe. Good morning, beautiful." he greeted, startling me. I groaned in pain at the movement.

"Do you have eyes in the back of your head or something?" I demanded weakly.

"No offense, dearest, but I could hear you coming a mile away. You sound like a stampeding elephant." He teased, chuckling to himself.

Fuming, I stormed past him and continued into the living room. I hunted down the remote and flicked on the TV to the news, lowering myself onto a white leather couch.

"-and don't forget about the Harvest Festival coming up on Fall 9! In other news, the search continues for missing nineteen-year-old farmer Pony Driskell, who was last seen walking home from Grant Gerrard's place in Forget-Me-Not Valley two weeks ago. No leads as to her whereabouts have been released yet, but if you have any additional information, please call-"

I couldn't take it anymore, and flipped off the TV. Sure, I was grateful that Skye had saved my life and all, but why couldn't he have dropped me off at Dr. Hardy's instead? Did he really _have _to kidnap me, and cause the whole valley to freak out? Kai must be frantic... Maybe I could give him a call, let him know I was okay?

I patted my pockets, but my cell phone was nowhere to be found. I remember that I had it when I was babysitting Kate, right before I was attacked, and it wasn't like the wild dog would've had any interest. That narrowed it down to one person: Skye, the Phantom Thief. _Figures._ But what would he want with my cell phone?

"_Skye!"_ I yelled furiously. "Get in here _now!_"

He rushed into the room, wiping his greasy hands on a paper towel. He grinned, stifling a laugh as he took in my atrocious bedhead. "You rang?"

"_What did you do with my cell phone?_" I interrogated hotly.

"I do not know what you are talking about, but I shall keep an eye out for it." He smirked.

"You're a horrible liar. I don't need to be a gambler to see _that! _Now, where are you hiding it?"

Skye shook his head, a small but mischievous smile forming on his lips. "I don't know."

"I will ask you this calmly one more time before I break your scrawny neck and hide your dead body somewhere where nobody will ever find it," I declared slowly, but dangerously. "Not that they'll be looking."

"Hehe. A little harsh, don't you think? It appears that a good night's sleep did not fix the fact that you wish to murder me."

"Stop stalling. Where's my phone?"

"I still do not know, but even if I somehow _did_, there would be a price for that information. Speaking hypothetically, of course."

"And if you _did_ know anything about it, I would refuse to _'pay the price', _but instead torture you in some slow and painful manner until you divulged that information. Speaking hypothetically, of course."

"And then, hypothetically, before you could raise a hand against me, I would use my Maiden Chick Beam and freeze you to the spot."

"As soon as I unfroze, I'd head back to the valley and lead an angry mob here, at which point you'd be arrested and taken to jail."

"But before you could unfreeze, I'd lock you in my room and keep you my hostage forever. I'm already a dirty thief; why not add another title to that list?"

"You wouldn't dare," I snorted. "You're not _that _cruel."

He raised an eyebrow. "Try me."

I crossed my arms and pouted, giving up on the course of action that involved murder. That meant that I could either lose my phone, or _pay the price. _I was already fairly certain what that price involved, and so it looked like Kai would just have to wait another few days until I busted out of here. There was no way in hell that my lips were getting anywhere near his girly face.

"Fine. Gimme some food and leave me to mourn my loss alone."

"As you wish." Skye bowed dramatically, walking back into the kitchen. He reappeared a few seconds later carrying two plates of my favorite food. He sat one plate on the table in front of me, and the other directly to the left of it. To my agitation, he plopped down next to me on the couch. I scooted away until I reached the armrest on the edge of the couch, taking my bacon with me.

"Go away, Skye. I don't wanna to talk to you right now." I snapped.

"We don't have to talk." he emended quietly. And so we sat there in silence, enjoying our breakfasts. At least, he was. I hated awkward silences. I scarfed down my meal within seconds and let out a powerful belch.

The thief stared blankly at me, shocked that a maiden would do such a thing. His expression then turned playful, his eyes gleaming with mischief and an impish grin lighting up his usually smug face.

"One moment, please," he sang, standing up and going back into the kitchen. When he returned, he was holding an aluminum can in each hand. He smacked one down in front of me, then popped the tab on his own. "I refuse to be outdone by a mere maiden."

"Oh, it is _so _on!" I challenged. "You're going down!"

"You doubt my burping skills?" he asked in mock horror.

"Yes." I replied playfully, popping the tab on my own soda.

I soon discovered that he was pretty good. Really good, actually. But he was still no match for _me_. Girl or not, I could put any dude to shame who dared challenge me at my own game.

**A/N: This'll probably be the last chapter that I'll be able to write for a day or two. I'm on diaper duty (Ha, I made a pun XD) and probably won't have enough time to write the next chapter in what little spare time I'll have.**

**This is probably getting really annoying by now, but please review! They make me happy! :P**


	9. Chapter 9: Distance

**A/N: I'm baaack! Did ya miss me? ;)**

**Thanks for all of the reviews :) You guys rock!**

"Hehe. I never knew that a maiden as beautiful as yourself could be so..."

"Masculine?" I offered. "Yeah, wish I could say the same about you."

He chuckled and shook his head in amusement, his silvery hair cascading around his face like a waterfall.

"You know, Pony, I am beginnning to become accustomed to your sarcasm. I find it rather attractive."

"Who said I was being sarcastic? I was just _stating the obvious._" I snickered, using one of his favorite phrases.

Skye smiled coolly and stood up from the leather couch, offering me a pale hand. I rolled my eyes and sighed. _Will he ever learn?_

"I am perfectly capable of walking, thank you very much." I replied, cautiously lifting myself up. Before I could make any progress, the thief's hands were on my shoulders, restraining me to my seat. I gave him the death stare.

"I do not want you to strain yourself any further than you already have. At least allow me to help you up."

"Not in a million years."

The Phantom Thief shrugged. "Suit yourself."

In one swift move, he lifted me off of the couch and into his scrawny arms.

"Get your filthy paws off of me! I have legs, you know!"

"Very nice ones, at that. But I needed an excuse to close the distance you usually put between us, and this seemed to be the perfect opportunity."

"I'll close the distance between us," I snapped. "I'll stick my foot so far up your ass that your breath will smell like feet!"

"You and your threats." he chuckled, carting me through the kitchen and down the hallway, past his bedroom.

"Where are you taking me?" I grumbled.

"I recall promising that I would show you why I steal today. I am a man of my word, thief or not."

"Man? You look more like a bearded lady to me." I commented, examining the stubble on his chin.

Skye shifted my weight to his left arm and ran his free hand along his jaw. "Yes, I suppose I've gotten a little scruffy over the past few weeks. I have not been able to..._aquire_...any more razors, as I have been too worried about your health to leave you by yourself."

"I can take care of myself," I pouted. "I'm a legal adult, you know."

"When you are conscious and healthy, maybe. But certainly not when you are attacked by a wild animal and out cold from blood loss," He made a sharp right when the hallway ended and came to a halt at a cracked door, where he gingerly set me down as if I were made of glass. "This is it."

"Should I be afraid to know what 'it' is?"

"No, not at all." he assured me.

"And Gustafa isn't waiting to ambush me as soon as I walk through the door?"

He rolled his eyes. "Do you honestly believe I would let that _monstrosity_ anywhere near my house?"

"Yeah, you're right, even _you _aren't _that_ dim-witted." I took a deep breath, and pushed open the door.

The room was very small and simple, containing only a bed, a desk, and a dresser. The aqua-blue walls were plastered with neat sketches, half of which being of the same beautiful, smiling woman who somehow looked familiar.

Though the drawings were gorgeous, they weren't what caught my eye. What I really noticed was a tiny girl propped up on her elbows on the bed, engrossed over a book. At least, she was until I walked into her room and disturbed her reading. She glanced over in my direction, acknowledging me with a nod and a smile before turning her attention back to her book.

The girl's seafoam-colored curls fell in perfect ringlets past her shoulders and down the length of her slender frame. She had pale ivory skin, and her sapphire eyes were a deep blue, like the depths of the ocean. Just like the woman in what I assumed were her drawings, she looked very familiar.

"Her name is Mia." Skye explained quietly.

"I'm assuming she's not your sister?"

"No, we are not related, as you can probably tell by our very different appearances."

"I was actually referring to how she knows how to shut her trap for an extended period of time, but yeah, I can see where you're coming from, too."

A melodic laugh made me turn my attention back to the child, who was now grinning like a hyena and staring at me with admiration in her deep blue eyes.

"Don't give her any ideas!" Skye scolded me playfully, joining in Mia's laughter. "Wonderful. Now I am going to have not one, but _two _beautiful women insulting me constantly."

"There are lots more where that came from, Skyler!" Mia pointed out between giggles, joining in the conversation.

"I like her." I laughed, jerking a thumb towards the sassy little girl with a knack for insulting the Prince of the Stars.

**A/N: Sorry it was kind of a short chapter! I was going to make it longer, but this seemed like a good place to stop for the night. I'll try to have the next one done tomorrow!**

**Tajreen: I'm still working on that one XD I have absolutely no idea! I'll think of something eventually ;)**

**As always, review! (Or Gustafa will find you! O_o)**


	10. Chapter 10: Compliments

"See, there's the Big Dipper, and that's Polaris way over there!" Mia babbled excitedly, tugging on my sleeve and pointing towards the night sky.

She was a natural at astronomy, extraordinarily so for a girl of her age. She was only seven, for goddess's sake, and she already knew just about every constellation known to man, along with the dates they were discovered and the stories behind each one. Hell, I'm nineteen and I couldn't tell you the phases of the moon if my life depended on it!

"Goddess, Mia! Where do you learn this stuff? Does Skye teach you, or what?"

She rolled her eyes, a gesture that she picked up from me in the short time I'd known her. "Of course not, silly! His little brain couldn't hold that much information, let alone teach it!"

I smiled. She was like a smaller version of myself. I taught her well. "Yeah, you're totally right, I should've known better."

Before I could press her for more information, the tiny girl's hand flew to her mouth, trying to conceal a yawn.

"You're tired," I stated. "Time to head back inside before Skye throws a temper tantrum."

"No!" she pouted, jutting out her bottom lip. "I'm not sleepy!"

"But you _have _to go inside, Mia!" I pleaded. "The boogey man will get us if we stay out too late!"

"Liar, liar, pants on fire!" she sang. "There's no such thing as the boogey man- Skyler said so! You gotta do better than _that_!"

"Alright, alright. I'll give you five gold if you go to bed."

"Make it twenty and you got a deal."

"Ten."

"Twenty five."

"Fifteen?"

"Thirty!"

"Deal." I agreed with a sigh. Looks like I wouldn't be buying any chickens this month like I'd planned...

I rummaged around in my disorganized wallet, trying to find enough gold to bribe the devious child with.

"All I got is a fifty."

"That'll work!" she chimed, snatching the gold piece out of my hand and speeding back inside.

I smiled triumphantly and stood from the porch swing, following the girl inside. My smile quickly dissolved, however, when I recognized the odor of curry and blew chunks all over the kitchen. Including the chef.

Skye looked in dismay at his ruined silk shirt, dabbing at the contaminated areas with a wet paper towel.

"Sorry 'bout that," I apologized casually. "You need a new wardrobe anyways. It's an omen!"

"It appears that you are ill again, love," he sighed. "I shall return after I put on a new shirt."

When he had disappeared down the hallway, I began to raid his fridge for ingredients. Mom used to make these things for me called Spritzers whenever I was sick as a child, and they made me feel better about 90% of the time. It was a fairly simple drink, containing only cranberry juice and ginger ale, but it did the trick.

I found ginger ale easily, but the cranberry juice was trickier. For some reason, instead of being in a plastic container, it was in a glass bottle. _Weird. _I was surprised Skye even _had _cranberry juice in the first place- most people don't like it.

I took my beverage into the living room and prepared a makeshift bed on the couch, using extra pillows to support my neck. When I was all set up, I took a small sip of my drink, but spat it out immediately. It tasted like a mixture of vinegar and fruit juice, and somehow it was dry. _Maybe I was just imagining things._ I took a larger drink to make sure. _Not bad. Maybe it's an acquired taste or something. _Suddenly, I began to feel a little dizzy, as if I could feel the Earth moving beneath me. It wasn't a bad feeling, really. I actually felt sort of... happy. I grinned for no reason in particular.

"Hehe. I'm glad to see my lovely Pony is feeling better." Skye commented, emerging from the hallway.

"Your hair is so pretty!" I giggled happily, not a care in the world. "I wanna touch it!"

He flashed me a cool, if not somewhat bewildered, smile. "I am glad that you think so. Hehe. And here I was thinking that you'd have to be drunk to pay me such a compliment."

"You're so funny, Skye!" My giggles turned into loud hysterics, and I rolled dizzily off of the couch and onto the floor with a _thud._ My neck didn't even hurt anymore, for some reason. "I love you bunches! Kiss me!"

The Phantom Thief's eyes opened wide in shock. "Oh my goddess. You _are _drunk, aren't you?"

"Nuh-uh!" I pouted in a sudden mood change, scrambling to my feet. "I'm too young to drink, 'member? The p'lice would come and take me to jail!"

"The wine!" he gasped, sprinting into the kitchen. He retrieved the stolen Okuhattan from the fridge and shoved the half-empty bottle into my open hand. "Did you, by any chance, drink any of this?"

"The cranberry juice!" I cheered. "You found it! Yay! Now Skye can have a Spritzer, too- whoopies!"

My eyes filled with tears as the bottle slipped from my fingers and shattered on the ground. "Aww!"

"Pony, you're drunk," he stated firmly, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. "Please lay down on the couch until the alcohol gets out of your system. That is an order."

"Don't tell me what to do, you big meanie!" I argued, stomping towards him. "Kiss me!" I repeated, making fish lips and leaning towards him. I lost my balance and toppled forward, bringing us both down and falling on top of him. He winced.

"Pony? Skye?" Mia's voice called from her room. "Can I have a glass of water?" She sleepily dragged herself into the living room, her eyes growing wide as she took in the scene before her. She cleared her throat. "Umm... this is kinda awkward. I'm just gonna get a drink all by myself." The girl retreated back into her room.

Skye gently pushed me off of him and stood, offering me a hand, which I didn't take notice of. "I believe that we have scarred enough children for life for tonight, don't you?"

I just giggled.

He sighed, hesitantly walking into the kitchen and opening a new bottle of wine from the fridge. "If you can't beat 'em..." And took a swig from the bottle himself.

**A/N: Eh. I'm running out of stuff to put in these things.**

**This chapter really wasn't as good as the rest of 'em, in my opinion. Not nearly enough insults. Sorry. I have a pretty good idea for the next one, though, so it shouldn't take me that long to update.**

**Reviews are appreciated, as always! :D**


	11. Chapter 11: Assumptions

**A/N: Hi, everyone! I didn't disappear off of the face of the Earth- I swear! School just started, so I haven't been able to stay up till one in the morning trying to finish up a chapter anymore. Updates are going to be a little slow from now on, but please bear with me unless you want to do my homework to clear up a little free time ;)**

You know those enormous trucks that you pack all of your junk in when you move into a new house? It felt like I'd been hit by one. Repeatedly. My head was throbbing, my throat felt like the Sahara Desert, and my mouth tasted as if a cat mistook it for a litter box. What a wonderful start to my day.

I sat up groggily and yawned, stretching out my stiff limbs, but startled slightly when my foot made contact with something that felt unusually similar to human skin. Or, to be more accurate, screamed bloody murder before tumbling ungracefully off of the side of the bed.

"Mmm... too loud... trying to sleep..." grumbled Skye's almost incomprehensible voice.

"I don't give a crap about your beauty sleep! Get out of my bed!" I demanded from the floor, too lightheaded to try to get up.

He sat up reluctantly, his emerald eyes fluttering open. A deep crease formed on the thief's forehead as he took in his surroundings, trying to find the source of the noise that awakened him.

"Pony? Is that you, my love?"

"Don't call me that!" I snapped. "And put a shirt on, for Goddess' sake! No one wants to see your man-boobs, including me!"

His head turned in my direction, a weird look on his face. He didn't look me in the eyes, instead focusing on a point slightly to my left. "I-It is fairly common for a man to sleep without a shirt, you know." _Was that a stutter?_

"Yeah, a regularally proportioned man, sure! But considering you have the body of an obese nine year old and no muscles to speak of, you are a walking chick repellent and I'd prefer not to have this image scratched into my corneas for the rest of my natural life."

"Hehe. You know you like it." he snickered, the usual smug look reappearing on his face.

"I. Do._ Not_."

"You do, actually. You have neglected to attempt to feed me my internal organs with a spoon or murder me in another equally disturbing manner, which is quite an improvement. If this had happened last week, I would without a doubt be headless by now."

I ground my teeth together and shut my eyes, trying to hold off on attacking the Prince of the Stars. As he pointed out a few days ago, it wouldn't get me anywhere; he'd just use his weird freeze ray thing and I'd have to stay in this dump even longer. When and if I _did _manage to cause him pain and/or kill him, it would have to be plotted in advance.

"By your lack of response, I assume that you do not have a sarcastic comeback, which only means that you agree with my statement and do, in fact, believe me to be sexy. I thank you for the compliment."

I squeezed me eyes shut even tighter, making the skin on my forehead wrinkle. Taking a deep breath, I tried to relax like I was taught as a kid when my school counselor diagnosed me with 'anger management issues'. Of course, I'd kicked the counselor's ass for suggesting that I had problems of any kind, but it couldn't hurt to try it now, could it?

"You will find me in the kitchen when you are finished with your meditation." Skye smirked, dodging a punch I threw blindly in his direction.

I heard the door swing shut, sending a small gust of air into the room. It felt kind of... drafty. My eyes flew open as I realized why.

Running both mentally and verbally through my entire list of words meaning shit, I searched frantically for my missing clothes. How had I not noticed that I was butt naked? How had _Skye _not noticed that I was butt naked? Or... did he?

_'I-It is fairly common for a man to sleep without a shirt, you know.'_

The stutter. _Crap, crap, crap! I should've known! The pervert! _My search became even more frantic for my missing articles of clothing.

"What the hell?" I heard a familiar voice question through the shut door as I was digging through a hamper.

"Kai?" I inquired, half believing that I was hallucinating. _How'd he find me? _Forgetting my current yet vital task, I bolted from the bedroom, coming to a halt a few feet from the open front door where my brother was standing. He took a step back, his eyes growing as wide as dinner plates.

"_What the hell?_"

"Kai? What's wrong? It's just me!" I took a step forward, extending my arms to give him a hug. Kai took another step back, putting his hands out protectively as if to ward me off.

"As stoked as I am to see you, Pony, I...er...can see that you're busy right now, and I don't wanna interrupt."

"Interrupting?" _Interrupting what?_ _"_No way! You have no idea how much I've wanted to see you! Let's get outta here. C'mon."

"Um... No. You don't have to leave just to make me happy. 'S all good. Stay as long as you want." He winked, though it looked kind of like a grimace.

"Seriously Kai, what's your problem? Why are you acting so weird?" I demanded, but soon after realized he reason for his strange behavior. I blinked, feeling my cheeks grow hot. "Oh. Right. Clothes. I should be wearing those."

My foster brother chuckled nervously. "Yup. Same goes for your...boyfriend. So, I'm just gonna leave now. Er...Have fun."

"_Boyfriend?_" I sputtered, though he'd already disappeared into the dense trees. Smart move on his part.

I sighed. Sounds like Kai got an eyeful of The Phantom Thief. If I'm naked, that meant that Skye probably was, too. I shivered, realizing what that most likely meant. I remembered bits and pieces of last night, but definately nothing about sleeping with him. On the other hand, I was pretty hammered. At least, I thought so. I'd never been drunk before, but I'm pretty sure this is what it felt like. The damn thief must've spiked my juice when I wasn't looking. I wouldn't put it past him.

"_Skye!_" I growled, slamming the front door. "Get your girly ass in here _now!_"

He shuffled uncomfortably into the living room, his eyes closed tightly and a towel wrapped around his waist.

"On second thought, get your _clothed _girlyass in here!" I rephrased.

He nodded thankfully, attempting to head back down the hallway but instead running face-first into a wall. I doubled over with laughter, despite my bad mood. Skye stood, using one hand to hold the towel in place and one to lift himself from the ground. He attempted to raise an eyebrow while simultaniously keeping both eyes shut, making one eye twitch spastically. He looked like he was having a seisure or something, and I laughed even louder.

"Would you rather my eyes be open? I am keeping them shut for your privacy- a difficult task, I might add- but just say the word and that will no longer be an issue."

I rolled my eyes even though he couldn't see the gesture, my laughter stopping abruptly. "Just put some clothes on."

"A simple 'please' would be nice." Skye muttered so low that I almost couldn't hear.

"I didn't say please because it wasn't a request."

He shrugged it off, taking a few cautious steps and trying to find the wall with one hand to avoid another collision.

_I need to find my clothes, too... I wonder where that pervert hid them? _I began searching various places in the living room- under the couch, behind the curtains, on top of the TV- but had no luck. I was definately not going commando and anything of Skye's was out, but maybe Mia had something that would fit?

When I entered her room, she was still sleeping, snoring slightly with her arm draped over her forehead. I smiled, crossing the room silently to the dresser in the opposite corner. _Too small... Way too small... Could a newborn even fit in this?... _I thought as I dug through each drawer, destroying the neatly folded piles each contained. I finally settled for a plain t-shirt and a skirt, as the legs on every set of pants were too slender for me to fit in. The outfit being several sizes too small, it appeared as if I were wearing a belly shirt and a mini skirt, two things I would never be caught dead in under normal circumstances. Mia was also too young for bras, and I wasn't going to wear her underwear for obvious reasons, so there were two more things I had to worry about. Hopefully, it would go unnoticed by Skye. If I was lucky. Which I'm not.

I took a deep breath, preparing for the snarky comments that were sure to come, and walked calmly back into the living room.

"Did your outfit shrink in the wash?" The thief teased, decked out in his usual leopard print. "Or did that Twinkie you ate the other day finally catch up to you?"

"Oh, haha! You're one to talk! If your pants were any tighter, you'd have to use the Jaws of Life just to get them off!"

He chuckled. "Sad, but true nonetheless."

"Now that we're finished exchanging insults, would you mind explaining to me why you were naked in my bed?"

He grinned devilishly, no doubt pleased to hear those words come out of my mouth. He'd better savor it- it would be the only time he'd hear those words period, whether from me or any other girl with a brain. "If you recall, it was _you _who was naked in _my _bed."

I inhaled deeply, as a mother might when she discovered her child scribbling all over the walls with a crayon.

"You know what I meant." I growled, starting to get frustrated from his constant stalling.

The thief sighed, disappointed at his failed attempts of distraction. "I don't know. Truly, I don't."

"_Sure. _Just like you don't know where my clothes are."

"Pony, I do not know _where_ your clothes are, I do not know _why_ we were naked- although I think we can both take a good guess at that one- and I do not have _any _recollection of last night. I swear it upon my honor as a thief. Look into my eyes and tell me I am lying."

I did as he asked. "You. Are. Lying." I said simply, exaggerating each word in an attempt to get it past his thick skull. "But it doesn't matter. I'll find out eventually, and when I do, the consequences will be a lot worse than missing clothes. So, if you've got half a brain, I suggest you go ahead and tell me the truth before I get angry, at which point I will switch to less pleasant methods." I smiled amiably, though I'm sure he could see in my eyes that I wanted to beat the tar out of him right now.

"Ha! Way to tell him, Pony!" A high-pitched voice cackled. Out of nowhere, a platinum-blonde with crimson eyes appeared on the couch beside Skye, her feet propped up on the coffee table. I gaped, but Skye just rolled his eyes and twisted a strand of hair idly, appearing bored.

"Hello, Vivian," he greeted unenthusiastically.

"Yo, Skyler. Long time no see. How 'bout making yourself useful and popping me some popcorn? This is quite a show you got going on here."

"That won't be nessesary. We have things under control, isn't that right dearest?"

I glared at him, and he glared right back. _Play along, _his eyes pleaded.

"Yep. Nothing to see here." I agreed.

"Hmph. That's too bad. It took me forever to come up with this magnificent plan, and you two killjoys just _ruined it for me!"_ The girl named Vivian pouted, a mischiveous glint in her eyes. "I came here to see a fight, and I'm gonna get one!"

Abruptly, she turned to the thief, pecking him on the lips. Skye stared blankly at her, dumbfounded, and she grinned back wickedly. Silence echoed throughout the room.

"Woah. Where did _that _come from?" I wondered, breaking the uncomfortable pause.

"Are you really _that _dumb? I just kissed your boyfriend! Aren't you jealous? Aren't you gonna fight me?"

"He's not my boyfriend!" I snarled, fed up with people making the same assumption. "And I'm not gonna waste my strength on a desperate hag like yourself, that's why!"

"You _fool!_" Vivian spat. "You'll pay for that!"

She began muttering strange incantations under her breath, though it sounded like gibberish to me. I glanced at Skye questioningly, but he was still in shock, not quite comprehending what was going on.

"_Hey!_" Mia's shrill voice snarled as she stomped into the living room. She pointed an accusing finger at the platinum-blonde, who was still muttering under her breath. ""What is this _hag _doing here?"

"See? She agrees with me. In your face!" I taunted, though Vivian paid me no mind.

"Dang! How'd ya make her so mad?" Mia questioned.

I shrugged. "She doesn't look that mad to me. I mean, few minutes ago she called me a fool and said that I'd pay, but she looks alright now."

"Uh-oh. This isn't good, then."

"What? What's not good?"

"Hear that stuff she's saying? It's a curse. She's cursing you. You should prob'ly get outta here before she finishes."

"_Cursing me?_"I laughed. "What's she gonna do? Magically waste a few more minutes of my time?"

"Actually, I think she's gonna turn you into a cockroach."

Wow. This day kept getting better and better. But hey, if the Earth were to suddenly become covered in nuclear waste, I'd be set. Pony-1, Hag-0.

Suddenly, the witch reached a crescendo, chanting the strange phrases even louder than before. A red beam of light shot from her fingers and I ducked, missing it minus a few scorched hairs. Mia wasn't so lucky.

I shielded my eyes from the blinding flash of light as the beam collided with the girl, and when it was over, she was nowhere in sight.

"_Mia!_" Skye cried, coming back to reality.

"_Now _it's getting interesting! The world is a better place without that little brat in it. Wow. I can't believe I did something good for once, even if it was by accident."

"_Where is she?" _The thief growled. "_What did you do to her?"_

"That's for me to know, and for _you_-" She tapped him lightly on the nose. "-to never find out!"

"Bring her back. This instant!"

"No way! This is the most fun I've had in decades!"

"I am warning you!"

"Psh. Don't make me laugh, pretty boy! You're in no position to make threats!"

"CHICK-BEAM... FIRE!"


	12. Chapter 12: Emotions

**A/N: Again, sorry about the the lack of updates everyone! My teachers decided that it would be cool to assign me three projects and four tests in the first three weeks of school. Fun fun!**

**By the way, I forgot to mention in my last update that the name "Vivian" came from Animal Parade (I think). When you married the Witch Princess, her name was revealed to be Vivi, but I thought that sounded weird so I changed it up a little. Anyways, hope this chapter's alright! :)**

"So, you're trying to tell me that hag is actually a-"

"Witch? Yes. Witch _Princess_, to be precise."

"And Mia is- _was_- a goddess?"

The Phantom Thief winced at the name. "Yes. That is also correct."

"And you didn't tell me this before because...?"

"I assumed that you had already figured it out on your own. Her appearence is a dead giveaway- The resemblance to the Harvest Goddess is uncanny."

"Was that an insult?" I scoffed. "Because if it was, I'm gonna rip off your arm and beat you with the stump. Just thought I'd let you know."

"This is serious, Pony! Mia is missing. Possibly even dead by now." He choked out the last few words, a solitary tear running down his cheek.

"The infamous Phantom Thief is crying? What are you, a little girl? Wait, don't answer that."

"This is no time to make fun of my questionable sexuality. Please try to understand."

"Yeah, sorry. If it makes you feel any better, I don't think she's dead; she may just be kinda, uh, smaller in stature."

"I am not following you."

"Mia said the spell would turn me into a cockroach."

He shook his head, smiling sadly. "She was wrong. The spell was one of transportation, not transformation. Mia always _did _manage toget the two mixed up, being the scatterbrain that she was."

I narrowed my eyes suspiciously. "How do _you _know what the spell did? Last time I checked, you were a thief, not a fairy godmother."

"I cannot reveal that just yet. As I once said, it would take the all of the mystique out of our relationship. What remains of it, at least."

"This has nothing to do with our non-existant relationship!" I said, on the verge of shouting. "This has to do with a missing child! Goddess, Skye!"

"There is no need to rip my head off, beautiful. Besides, you should not ruin your vast radiance with such raw anger."

"You sound like a broken record."

"Please forgive me- I've been too preoccupied saving your life to think of any more of my signature lines. I could switch to pick-up lines, if you'd prefer?"

"Doesn't matter either way," I snorted. "They're not gonna work, just tick me off even more than I already am. If you have any sense of self-preservation at all, you'll stop them all together."

"Ah, but you forget about my Chick-Beam, as poor Vivian did."

I glanced over at the frozen witch, her face still twisted in a sneer from when she was arguing with Skye not five minutes ago. "Why is her head frozen? I remember back at the bar that I could still talk and everything, just not move."

"I can control both the duration and areas affected," he explained. "I did not freeze your gorgeous face because I could not bear the thought of such an angelic voice being silenced, even if only for a few minutes."

"Skye..." I warned. _I'm really getting tired of this crap. Maybe I should go ahead and kill him to do the world a favor..._

"My apologies, beloved Pony. I cannot seem to help myself in your presence."

"This is worse than pick-up lines!" I groaned. "Could you at least _try _to keep the douchebaggery to yourself?"

"No. It is in my nature."

"You're unbelieveable."

"Why, thank you."

I make this sound that's halfway between a groan and a scream and pull at my hair, ruining my ponytail. Skye smiled tolerantly.

"Ugh! I can't take this anymore!" I exploded, stomping towards the door and flinging it open, flinching at the cool breeze I let in from outside. I'd forgotten that it was Fall now. "Goodbye! So long! Have a nice life! Oh, what do I care, may Gustafa's music haunt you until your ears turn inside out!"

"I forbid you to leave this house," Skye asserted. "You do not know the way home and you are in no condition to be out in the cold."

"Who are you, my mother? Besides, I don't have a _condition!_" I spat.

"Even if that were true, you still would not have the faintest idea how to get back to Forget-Me-Not-Valley. If you are that determined to leave, at least allow me to escort you." The thief's lips pressed together in a hard line, as if he were having a hard time keeping his temper in check.

"Just because I'm a girl doesn't mean I can't do anything by myself! I can find my own damn way home!"

"Fine! Leave! It is not my fault if you freeze to death. Do not come crying to me when you are lost in the middle of the woods."

"Fine!" I echoed, slamming the door behind me with all of the force I posessed. Now staring out at the wide expanse of the surrounding forest, I came to a conclusion: I was screwed. I was wrong about the whole finding my own way home thing. It just wasn't gonna happen. It looked like the Amazon Rainforest out here. I half expected to see Tarzan to swing out on a vine and start battling a leopard or something. I grudgingly re-entered the house that I'd been held hostage in for the past few days, the screen door shutting with an audible _click _behind me. I gently shook Skye's shoulder, grimacing at the contact, who was now laying down on the couch with his back towards me.

"Just... go." He mumbled.

"Skye, you were right," I said in a gentle voice that almost made me gag. I gritted my teeth, trying to keep the nice pretense going so I could go home. "About the escorting back to the valley thing. I actually need your help. For once."

He rolled over to face me, his eyes slightly narrowed and his mouth a frown. "I shall help you this once, but afterwards, you will see no more of me. I give up; you win. We should go our seperate ways. It would be beneficial to us both. I see that now."

"_Thank _you! I've been trying to 'go our seperate ways' since we first met! You have no idea how much easier that will make my life!"

His eyes softened a little, and I briefly wondered if I'd gone too far. Before I could ask if he was alright, Skye had begun walking briskly to the other side of the room, grabbing a long black coat from a rack and abruptly tossing it my way. I fumbled with it for a moment before it fell to the floor in a heap. His foot tapped impatiently.

"Is it humanly possible to move any slower, Pony? I have more pressing matters to attend to today than helping a naive girl find her way home."

_Who crapped in _his _cornflakes? _I thought, wondering what happened to the typical flirty behavior that I'd grown accustomed to. The moment I recovered the dropped coat and slipped my arms through the too-long sleeves, he turned on his heel and left, not bothering to wait for me. To my dismay, I had to jog to match his long strides, which was very difficult when you consider that I'd been bedridden for the past few weeks and was extremely out of shape. I think that Skye was right again in saying that I'd put on some weight; I felt like freakin' Shamu!

I mostly concentrated on trying to keep pace with Skye, though I was vaguely aware of stepping over a few tree roots and ducking under the occasional tree branch. Trying to, at least. At one point, the thief moved a branch to the side to allow himself to pass, but "forgot" to hold it up for me, which resulted in a painful jab in the eye and what I'm pretty sure was a broken nose.

"You're such a gentleman." I remarked dryly.

He remained silent, continuing on as if I had said nothing.

"The silent treatment, huh? Oldest one in the book. I thought you were more creative than that."

The Phantom Thief still did not have a usual comeback, though I noticed he was a little more careless, occasionally stumbling the slightest bit or almost losing his footing.

"You know, Skye, most psychologists agree that the silent treatment can lead to unstable and possibly violent emotions, especially in women. I think I feel one coming on now."

Skye whirled around, a fierce scowl contorting his features that looked out of place. He had never been one to show any emotion besides a cool indifference, and it was weird seeing him genuinely angry.

"Shut. Up. Pony."

"Alright, alright! Yeesh. _Someone_ needs a Happy Meal. But seriously, that's no way to treat the girl you're gonna spend the rest of your life with. It was in the stars, remember?" I teased, hoping I could get him to calm down a little.

"Fuck the stars." He growled, his eyes blazing menicingly.

Now, I had a reputation for having a little bit of a potty-mouth, but I'd never dropped the F-Bomb before. Well, except for that one time when I was like three... but that doesn't really count. The sarcastic retort I had in mind died on my lips, and instead I nodded sheepishly as he continued the hike and I again became invisible.

A minute or two later, Skye began to gradually slow and eventually came to a stop. A sense of relief washed over me as the trees began to thin out, and I could see a familiar clearing just ahead. I didn't meet his eyes as I walked past him, not because I was afraid, but because I was so eager to get back home. Even so, I could feel his gaze burning a hole in the back of my head as I continued towards my farm. When I reached my house after what seemed like an eternity, I briefly glanced back to where the Prince of the Stars used to be standing. Mostly out of guilt, I wanted to at least say bye before before he left, maybe even thank him for saving my life, even though the idea made me want to pull out my toenails one by one with a rusty pair of tweezers. But I was too late- he was already gone. Letting out a large and overly dramatic sigh of relief, I lifted up the doormat to retrieve the spare key I'd hidden there. As I soon discovered, the doormat is too obvious a place to hide a key.

"Can my life get any worse?" I screamed in frustration, pounding my fists uselessly on the locked door.

For some very sick reason, life gets a kick out of that question. The answer? Yes. Yes it could.


	13. Chapter 13: Replacement

"I'm going down to the bar, Ruby!" Rock called obnoxiously from the second floor of the Inn. His mother looked up from the computer where she was checking me in for the night, her kind dark eyes full of concern for her only son.

"Rock, honey, it's getting late. Go to your room, please; I'll read you a bedtime story as soon as I help this young lady find a room."

"_Mom!_" He whined, stretching the word into two syllables. "I'm not- Young lady, you say?"

The blonde stampeded down the stairs with the grace of a drunken cow, a cheesy grin plastered across his face as he approached me.

"So we meet again. The name's Kelley. Rock Kelley. How 'bout you and I go somewhere more private?"

I groaned internally. He was pulling a James Bond. Wasn't there a limit to the number of egotistical jerks that could live in a town at once? "Fine by me. Know anywhere we can find a dark, abandoned alley?"

A look of utter confusion and shock passed over his face. "Erm... no. I don't _do_ alleys. They're so dirty, and cold, and _dark!_" He shivered._ "_You wouldn't believe the things that would do to my hair."

I rolled my eyes. Did he not get that I just threatened him? "It's called sarcasm, Brock. Translation: I don't give two shits about your hair."

"It's Rock." He corrected cheerfully.

"Yeah, Crockpot, that's what I said."

"Break it up, you two! Rock needs to go to sleep now. Say goodnight, sweetie."

"But-"

"No buts, young man!"

Rock's shoulders drooped in defeat. "I gotta go, baby. I know it'll be torture to not be in the same room as someone as great as me for a while, but we can go on our date tomorrow, okay?"

"In case I was being too subtle for you, Rockhead, let me rephrase: I find you just about as attractive as a piece of crap that's been left in the sun too long."

"You find crap attractive?" He wrinkled his nose in disgust. "Well, who am I to judge? You chose me, after all, so you must have pretty awesome taste."

"Has anyone ever told you that your skull is thicker than Gustafa's nose?" I asked the idiot casually.

"Nope. You're the first," Rock chewed on the inside of his cheek for a moment before his eyes lit up like a Christmas Tree. "How do you know how thick my skull is, anyway? You don't... you don't have X-Ray vision, do you? That is too cool!" He turned to his mother, who by now had given up on getting her son to go to bed and was now idly playing Solitaire on the computer. "Ha! I told you Superman was real!"

If only there wasn't a witness in the room. I needed a punching bag right about now, and Rock was the perfect candidate. Oh well. If I couldn't beat him up at the moment, I could do the next best thing and get him to leave me the hell alone.

"Hey, Shamrock, I'll meet you in your room in ten minutes."

His eyes widened to the size of his ego, and then he was up the stairs faster than Gustafa could clear a room.

"Thanks," Ruby sighed gratefully. "What was your name again? You look familiar."

"Pony." I admitted reluctantly. By now, the whole valley will have heard what Kai discovered earlier. I was probably the laughing stock of the town. I wasn't looking forward to it.

"Oh, right! Kai told me that you went to visit some distant relatives in Castanet. Takakura was worried sick- you really should've told someone you were leaving!"

I nodded, relieved being an understatement that my brother didn't blab to the first person he encountered as I expected. "I'll try to remember that."

The dark-haired woman smiled, tossing me my keys. "Alright then, you're all set. Up those stairs, second room to the left."

I caught the keys despite my recent lack of hand-eye coordination and headed up the stairs to my temparary room, where I carefully locked the door behind me and plopped down on the bed, burying my head in a pillow. I wished that I could've stayed with Vesta, but it was too late, almost one in the morning, and I didn't want to trouble her. This wouldn't be neccesary if that damn thief wouldn't have kidnapped me in the first place.

Skye. To be completely honest, I missed him. Rock just wasn't a suitable replacement. Not even close. There were no witty comebacks, no innuendos, no nothing. He didn't even understand half of the things I was saying to him in the first place. Though I'm sure it would be just as satisfying beating the shit out of the dimwit, it's no fun if I can't bruise his inflated ego. That's the best part.

Without removing my head from the pillow, I blindly reached over and turned out the lamp on the bedside table. Tomorrow, I'd find my house keys, and then I'd make the person who stole them regret being born.

**A/N: I know, I know, this one's really short! I tried to drag it out as long as I could, believe it or not. Reviews would be awesome, if you've got a minute ;)**


	14. Chapter 14: Neutral

**Hi again, everyone!**

**You're probably tired of hearing this by now, but sorry 'bout the slow updates! Along with two sports and homework, I've been completely brain dead and haven't been able to get any ideas for this chapter. Any good ones, at least. So just a head's up: This one's really slow and boring. But hey, it's more than 900 words like the last one, so can I get a round of applause? ;)**

I cracked open an eye groggily, wondering why I was doomed to rude awakenings every morning. There was a girl I guessed was around my own age hovering over my bed, and she looked kind of pissed off. Her maroon hair was about medium length, halfway to her shoulders, and looked like it hadn't been brushed since the last Starry Night Festival. The girl's eyes were a purpley kind of color, not a violet shade like mine, but more of a blueish purple that matched her vest perfectly.

"Why are you in my room?" The girl demanded, though her voice remained calm at the same time.

I snorted, rising so that I was now propped up on the bed with my hands. "I don't know what you're smoking, but this room is mine."

She shrugged indifferently. "Keep telling yourself that. But it's actually my room, and I can prove it."

The red-head held up a set of two keys on a ring, which she jingled tauntingly in front of my face. I snatched them from her hand, careful not to stab myself, and examined them carefully.

"You _thief!_" I accused. "You stole my keys!"

"Excuse me? Did you just call _me a_ thief? What about that guy you're seeing behind everyone's backs?"

"How do you know about Skye?" I asked slowly, too surprised to comment on my relationship status.

"I didn't. It was a rumor I heard once, and you just confirmed it for me."

I deflated. "What do you want?"

The girl cocked her head to one side. "I dunno. World peace would be nice, I guess."

"Something realistic."

"World peace _is _realistic."

"Cut the hippie crap, please and thank you! You know what I mean."

"You don't have to bribe me. I know how to keep my mouth shut." She pretended to lock her lips with an imaginary key, and then threw it over her shoulder.

"Thank Goddess for that!" I sighed. "I've dealt with enough crap to last me a lifetime." I threw off the downy comforter and stood so that we were now at the same level. She held her hand out to me, which I shook.

"I'm Nami. The girl who's had to share a building as Rock for the past few months."

"Sucks for you. I'm Pony, a.k.a. the girl who's been stuck in the same building as the Phantom Thief for _weeks_."

"You _lived_ with him?" Nami asked incredulously. "Lucky girl. Everyone says he's hot beyond belief."

"I guess you could say that," I responded thoughtfully. "Y'know, if you were blind in one of your eyes and had that milky kinda film over the other."

But her comment got me thinking. I thought of Skye's silvery hair and the way it framed his mischievous, cat-like features, his vivid green eyes that glittered like the most valuable of gems when he smiled... Huh. I guess I could see how everyone might find him attractive. Everyone except me, of course.

"Seriously? That's weird. But he can't be all that bad. The girls in town are all swooning over him as if he were the Harvest King himself."

I felt a twinge of anger at the mention of the Harvest King. I'd never met him in person, though I did know that he banished Mia's mom to some weird planet or something along those lines. The Harvest Goddess. All because I wanted to sleep in past 6:00 in the freakin' morning on a Saturday. Was that really a crime? I mentally added his name to the top of my hit list.

"Hel-_lo_? Earth to Pony." Nami waved her hand in front of my face. I blinked rapidly. "I'm going downstairs to get some breakfast and have a word with Ruby about our room arrangement. You coming?"

"Yeah. Just a sec- I have to change."

It was then that I realized that I didn't bring a change of clothes. That's why I still had Skye's coat on in the first place... Ugh. I could almost see the smug expression on his face if he found out that I wore his clothes to bed. Somehow, he could turn the most insignificant little detail into something that rivaled an Apocalypse.

"On second thought, I'm coming with you."

She nodded, not pressing for details, though I did earn a weird look before she turned and began walking down the hallway. I trailed after her, the dreaded coat swishing around my knees at the movement.

"So why did you steal my keys again?" I inquired pleasantly. Though my anger hadn't completely evaporated yet, I needed to stay on this girl's good side; if she blabbed about me and Skye, then my reputation was officially down the toilet.

"I don't know what you're talking about, dude," Nami answered truthfully. "Those were the keys to _my _room; how else would I have gotten in after you locked me out last night?"

"True." I admitted, reluctant to say that I was wrong, but unable to come up with a good argument.

"Speaking of which, can I have them back? I have to pay a fine to have them replaced if I lose them."

I nodded, and tossed them to her as we descended down the stairs, which she neatly grabbed out of the air with one hand. When we reached the lobby, I saw Ruby intently reading something on the counter, her brow furrowed in concentration. When she heard us coming, she glanced up instinctively and smiled warmly.

"Hi, Nami. Pony. You kids came at a good time. We just got a note from-"

"The Phantom Thief?" I finished dully, recognizing what was going on immediately. _Aw, crap._

"Actually, yes!" She marveled. "But how did you-"

"Never fear, Rock is here!" Rock shouted as he burst through the front doors, interrupting his mom mid-sentence. For some reason that I couldn't even begin to fathom, the imbecile had tied a red bed-sheet around his neck and drew a large backwards "R" on the back with a Sharpie. He marched confidently to where Nami and I were standing, pushing both of us aside so as to position himself between us. The idiot draped an arm over each of our shoulders.

"Good morning, ladies. Please don't be afraid; I'm here now. Now step aside and let _me _deal with the thief. For I am- ROCKMAN!"

"PebbleBoy's more like it." Nami snorted. I stared at her pointedly, and she nodded, smiling slyly.

"One. Two. Three!" I shouted. We each seized one of his wrists and flipped him over our shoulders. "Rockman" hit the ground headfirst with a very loud, painful-sounding crash, and twitched a few times, but then stopped moving altogether.

"Oh no. Rock is unconscious." I commented unenthusiastically.

"Oops." Nami added.

"If anyone asks, he fell."

I stared in shock at the usually kind woman behind the counter, unsure if I heard her correctly.

She shrugged. "I should probably be concerned, him being my son, but he _did _bring it upon himself."

"Yeah. Totally." Nami agreed enthusiastically. "Now, what were you saying about the Phantom Thief before we were so rudely interrupted?"

Ruby cleared her throat. "Alright. The note. It says, 'I'm to waltz into the Inner Inn at 12 midnight. With love, Phantom Skye.' Waltz, huh? Sounds like a mighty bold thief."

_You have no idea, _I thought with a roll of my eyes.

"Ruby, don't you think you're being a little too casual about this?" Nami pointed out. "I mean, this is a criminal we're talking about. He could be dangerous!"

Her answer was a loud, muffled groan from a semi-conscious Rock. He clambered sluggishly to his feet and swayed unsteadily, putting a shaking hand on Ruby's desk to keep himself upright.

"Rockman... will save you! And then you girls... will fight over who gets to marry me... and then I'll catch the thief... and become famous... and we'll ride off into the sunset together on a white horse!"

"Pony?" Nami groaned.

"Got it." With a well-aimed punch to the side of his hollow head, Rockman didn't make another peep.

"So... Are you girls going to help me catch a thief tonight?" Ruby asked hopefully, paying no attention whatsoever to her son who was at this moment suffering from a minor concussion.

"Of course!" Nami answered for both of us. I tried to object, but she slapped a hand over my mouth before I could.

"Will you really? That means a lot to me. Thanks, you all! Be back here at 10:00 tonight!" The hotel owner beamed, whistling happily to herself as she went back to her work.

Nami removed her hand from her mouth and then abruptly grabbed my wrist, pulling me upstairs before I could protest. She dragged me into our room, slamming the door rather loudly behind her.

"Tell me everything you know about the Phantom Thief, and don't you dare leave anything out."

* * *

"So... You want us to catch him tonight, or not?" Nami questioned uncertainly when I had finished my story.

"I don't know" Was my honest reply.

"You _have _to know! It's not a hard decision. Either he's your friend, or he's not. Simple."

"I honestly don't know."

"Look, Pony," She sighed. "I'm trying to be nice and help you out here. If you want Phantom Skye to be caught, then we can make it happen. If you don't, then that can be arranged, too. But I can't help unless you tell me what you want."

There was a moment's pause as I mulled it over. I'd get a kick out of seeing his overly-confident face behind bars, but on the other hand, I didn't want to see him suffer. Unless I was the one causing the suffering in the first place. Then it was okay.

"I don't _care_." I rephrased. I decided to just let the cards fall where they may, as I felt completely neutral on the subject. But there was this weird feeling that lingered in my stomach like a heavy brick, one that I couldn't shake off. Was it anticipation? Guilt, maybe?

"Alright then," She declared. "I'm going to go with the voice inside my head on this one, and help Ruby. You okay with that?"

I nodded unenthusiastically.

"Then it's settled. I think The Phantom Thief has finally met his match."


	15. Chapter 15: Something

**(Edit: Oct. 8th) A/N: Hey, everyone! Sorry; I didn't realize this chapter was so crappy :/ Oh well. I'll make the next one better, I promise!**

**I just went through and made a few changes, by the way. After reading through it again, I realized that I made several mistakes and left out a couple words. I guess that's what I get for writing at two in the morning.**

The guy who said "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" summed it up nicely. Next to me, Satan was as innocent as a freakin' girl-scout selling cookies. I was _pissed_, and not the typical I-Want-To-Pull-My-Hair-Out kind of pissed, but more of the Get-The-Heck-Out-Of-Dodge-Or-I'll-Pull-Your-Spine-Out-Of-Your-Ass variation.

Why am I angry, you ask? Well, it all started when I decided to take a walk, just to get some fresh air and clear my head, you know? So I literally take one step outside... and it starts to snow buckets, right in the middle of Fall. I decided to head for the Goddess Pond anyway; it was always so peaceful there, even without the Harvest Goddess. So, I'm rounding the corner and I see this guy who looked like he was straight out of a Frankenstein movie, decked out in his white lab coat and all, and for some odd reason he was holding an old fishing rod. He had what probably used to be jet black hair, but was now showing slight hints of grey here and there, that stuck up at seemingly impossible angles and appeared to have been washed twice (at the most) in his lifetime. As for his eyebrows, it looked as if two particularly hairy caterpillars decided to take up residence on his forehead. Goddess only knows why they'd want to do _that_.

But it wasn't really the wack-job's appearence that grabbed my attention, nor was it the horrendous stench that smelt suspiciously like a decaying animal that seemed that to go along with it, even though both were certainly something to think about. No, what really caught my eye was what was on the end of his fishing line: a mutant.

While it was definitely not what popped into my head when someone said the word "monster", it was not any breed of animal I'd even seen before in my nineteen years. It had no shape at all; it was pretty much just a big blubbery mass with two beady eyes and a pink oval-shaped nose. It had a tangled, shaggy coat of fur that was a blinding tint of white and had little ponytail similar to my own on top of its head. In short, it was exactly how I'd picture the evolution of a Furby. If I wasn't so mad at the mangy beast, I actually would've called it cute.

Back on the other end of the fishing line, the mad-scientist-looking guy dropped the pole and started rubbing his hands together maniacally. There was a wild, inhumane look in his colorless eyes that reminded me of a psychopathic serial killer eyeing his next victim. Out of nowhere, he took off like a bullet in my direction, stopping just inches from my face so I could smell his rancid breath.

"It took the bait!" He screeched, then started cackling hysterically. "This is the moment we've all been waiting for! This is why I've been taking all of those supplements, all of those pills! Why I've stayed up for weeks straight, why I've taken the utmost care to never wear high heels on Tuesdays!"

"Umm... okay? I have no idea what you're talking about, nor do I want to," I commented dryly, waving a hand in front of my nose to clear the smell in what little space he put between our heads. "But what I do know is that you seriously need a tic-tac or _something!_ Your breath smells like my brother's bathroom on taco night."

"I need a tic-tac? _I _need a tic-tac?" The lunatic cackled, his voice rising an octave the second time. "I am not the one who needs anything, my dear darling girl! It is you who needs something! A very important something!"

"And what would that be?" I asked, crossing my arms with a built-up impatience.

"Ah, but I can't tell you! That would ruin all the fun, see?" He then pointed an accusing finger to his left, adding in a few extra cackles of laughter. "That's what _she _told me, at least. _She _knows everything! Everything, I tell you!"

"Who's _she_? What do I need that's so important?" I screamed, throwing my hands into the air in defeat.

"I know something you don't know!" The man who belonged in a mental institution sang. That was the last straw.

I grabbed him by the corner of his lab-coat and pinned him up against the Harvest Sprite tree, trying to scare it out of him, but that only made his hysterics louder.

"Tell me!" I growled, trying to think of a decent threat. "Or I'll... I'll let him go! Yeah, that's it, I'll let that hairy thing free!"

At once, the annoying giggles turned to a frenzy of frantic sobs.

"No! No!" He pleaded. "My life's work! It will be all for nothing! Nothing at all! My life will be empty, like _hers!_"

"Then _tell me!_" I repeated, making my voice sound threatening. "I'll do it, I swear to the Goddess I will!"

"_She _will not be pleased with me, not pleased at all!" The man screamed. "Don't do this, don't do this!"

"I _will _do this."

"Yes! Yes! I'll tell you, but I will face consequences later! Very deadly consequences..." His voice trailed off menicingly, and he took a deep breath and closed his eyes, seeming to be struggling with something for a brief moment. Then he practically exploded with his answers.

"_She _is the creator of _him_! You need the bait! The bait is key!"

I backed off, and the nut slumped against the tree and slid pitifully onto the snowy ground, sobbing and wailing like there was no tomorrow. Who was _he_? Who was _she _for that matter? It probably didn't even matter; why was I listening to a crackpot in the first place?

The bait... he'd said something about the bait. That would be the thing at the end of the fishing rod, right? Which meant... ew. It was in that creature's mouth. There was no way in hell I was sticking my hand in its mouth, no matter if I needed whatever it was or not. In the end, though, curiousity won over disgust and I stuck my hand into that awful thing's mouth, praying that the thing was an herbivore, and retreaved what the psycohpath called "the bait", which was key... which, ironically, was my set of keys, drenched in monster saliva.

"Mofu!" The monster exclaimed, his expression confused and angry at the same time. I stared dumbfounded at it. It could _talk? _While I was still in shock, the thing snatched the slimy keys from my open palm and scuttled off into the woods. Realizing that the only way to get back into my house was getting away, I took off, hot on his trail, or so I thought. This monster-human was fast for his size, and my being out of shape didn't help me very much, either. Several long hours of running in circles later, I headed back, drenched from head to toe in melted snow, and fuming. I shivered as a sudden gust of wind blew, wrapping my coat tighter around myself and dragging my tired feet back to the Inn. As I walked, I looked up and admired the stars twinkling in the night sky. I wondered absentmindedly how Skye could read them, or, rather, how he _thinks_ he can.

Next thing I know, I run into something hard and I'm flat on my back.

"Pony?" A silky-smooth voice questioned from the darkness. A hand grabs my own and I'm hoisted gently to my feet.

"Hey, Skye. That _is _you, right?"

"Hehe. The one and only." Skye answered, for who else could it be but my so-called Prince of the Stars?

"It's the thief! It's Phantom Skye!" A voice came out of seemingly nowhere.

"Hmm. It appears that I do not have much time tonight," The Phantom Thief announced coolly. "Could you sort of look the other way? I realize that you are a rottan liar, but it's a risk that I must take. As you can tell, I am cutting things too close for my liking on this fine evening."

"We never met." I agreed cheerfully in a sudden mood change. The corners of his mouth pulled down a little.

"No, no, that won't do. I cannot even bear to think of never meeting the maiden of my dreams. It is too painful."

"I never saw you?" I rephrased with the slightest roll of my eyes. His signature cat-like smile lit up his face.

"Better."

"This way! I think I see him now!" The voice came again. This time, however, Skye looked a little nervous; the voice didn't sound too far off.

"Much thanks, Pony, but now I must jet. I would like to have a word with you, but this is hardly the right place; I will be waiting for you at your home whenever you're ready," He turned around one last time and added, "May I just say that you're glowing with a vibrant beauty tonight? But then again, what's new?"

"I hate to burst your bubble, smart one, but we can't exactly get into my house at the moment." I admitted, but I don't think he heard me; he was already running down the dirt path that lead to my locked house. I shrugged. He'd find out on his own.

"Pony!" The voice from earlier called from behind me. I turned to see half of the town in what appeared to be an angry mob formation with Ruby in the lead, torches and pitchforks and all. What was up with all of the Frankenstein stuff? "Vesta, Marlin, and Celia came along to help with the ambush, but the Phantom got away. He slipped right by us! Have you seen him?"

I shook my head. "Nope, sorry, I haven't seen him anywhere. Have you tried the Inn? They say the criminal always returns to the scene of the crime, you know."

"I think you're right. Good idea. Thanks." said Celia quietly. Marlin wrapped a protective arm around her waist and glared daggers in my direction. _What did I do?_

"That thief's awfully slippery," Marlin argued. "Think, Pony. Use your brain for once. Do you honestly think he'd go back to where there could be an ambush lying in wait for him? I don't think so. There's a reason he's never been caught; he's a smart one."

"I beg to differ." I mumbled too low for them to hear.

"Well, I think it's a great idea!" Vesta piped up. "Marlin just needs to stop bein' a sourpuss and man up a little. Come on, y'all! We got us a thief to catch!"

Everyone followed her lead enthusiastically... except for Marlin. He, on the other hand, stayed behind to give me the death stare one last time before putting both hands in his pockets and trailing after the others, mumbling something about favoritism.

"Grow a pair, why don't cha? Don't be such a little prat!" I called tauntingly. His only response was a middle finger in my direction.


	16. Chapter 16: Answers

**A/N: And I thought it took me a long time to upload the last few chapters! WOW. I was experiencing some technical difficulties (aka used my tech-savviness to magically delete my entire Fanfiction folder), so _hopefully_ *fingers crossed* it will never take me that long to update again.**

**By the way, I snuck in a South Park reference towards the end. I don't think it should cause much confusion if you've never seen the show, but if it does, let me know and I'll be more than happy to change it :)**

"How'd you get in here? I lock the door for a reason!" I shouted into the dark room where I guessed Skye would be, slamming the door shut with my foot. I didn't expect that he'd actually make it inside, but there the door was, flung carelessly open as wide as the hinges would go. I shook the water out of my already ruined ponytail, hoping to splatter my unwelcome guest with melted snow, and flipped on the light switch. Sure enough, the silver-haired thief was sitting casually in a kitchen chair, propping his dirty feet on the table like he owned the place.

"Well," he began with a smirk that made me want to throw my shoe at his head. "It helps a great deal that I am a thief, therefore naturally an expert on breaking into homes. It was also a very convenient advantage that you do not have any sort of a security system installed. You really should look into that, by the way; any imbecile who knows how to wield a lock-pick could easily come and go as he pleases," his smile evolved into a full-blown grin, which contained a mixture of malice and vanity. "Not that I am complaining."

"That can be arranged," I snapped, the obnoxious sound of my stomach growling making the statement seem way less sincere than it actually was.

"You're hungry," he pointed out with a frown. "Will you please allow me to cook you dinner? I am a chef, you know. It would be a shame to put my numerous talents to waste."

"Ha!" I laughed without humor. "Chef my ass! I throw up every time I get near your so-called food! The only talent- note the singular form- that you possess is the ability to bug the crap out of me, and you always find a way to put it to good use!"

"There is no need to be hateful," he chuckled.

"There are plenty of reasons to be hateful!"

"Name five."

I held out my right hand, raising a finger in time with each point. "You stole from my friends, you stole from me, you kidnapped me, you broke into my house and, last but not least, let's not forget our little fiasco the other night! I've got hundreds- no, thousands- more, if you want me to continue!"

He only waved a hand daintily, urging me to go on. "Please do. I have all night, and besides, I never tire of hearing your magnificent voice deny the passionate love you feel for me. You do not have to hide it anymore, my darling- your love radiates from you like light from the afternoon sun."

"The only thing I'm hiding is a shotgun under my bed," I snarled. "and I don't plan on keeping it a secret for too much longer!"

"Ah!" the Prince of the Stars exclaimed. "Anger. The second stage of true love, denial being the first. Slowly but surely, my darling Pony- there is very little time left before we can finally be together."

"You're thinking of grief, not love," I corrected him, the anger evaporating from my voice as soon as I realized that I was only proving his point.

"Grief, love... they are one and the same, are they not?"

"Don't get all philosophical on me!" I groaned, throwing my hands into the air and looking to the sky in defeat. "Goddess, forgive me! If you'll let me make it through the night without committing first-degree murder, I'll find a way to make it up to you, I swear!"

"Bargaining," Skye smirked. "Third stage."

"Give it a rest!"

I stomped over to the kitchen, "accidentally" tipping the irritating thief's chair backwards on my way. That should shut him up for a while, I thought with a smug satisfaction. However, instead of the hollow sound of his head hitting the floor, I witnessed him performing a flawless backwards somersault and landing neatly on his feet. Skye bowed, sweeping his left hand across his torso with a complicated yet graceful flourish.

"Thank you, I will be here all week. Or perhaps longer. Hehe."

"The sooner I get an alarm installed, the better," I grumbled, throwing open the fridge door and scanning the contents. Upon hearing a frantic knocking on the front door, I stomped back to the front of the house and cracked the door just enough so that I could see whoever was there, but they couldn't see what- or rather who- was inside.

"Get out!" I snapped at the unwelcome visitor, who found it necessary burst through the door like a bat out of hell as soon as there was an opening. I silently hoped that Skye, dimwitted as he was, was at least smart enough to hide. He wasn't, of course. He just stood there, examining his nails like the diva he was at heart.

"And who, might I ask, are you?" the thief questioned the intruder. He was trying to sound casual, but I saw the crease that formed between his eyebrows and a subtle purse of his lips.

"How have you not heard of Rock the Kid?" said an all-too-familiar voice. "I'm, like, world-famous!"

Sure enough, it _was _Rockhead. I guess I hadn't noticed before because of the flamboyant red, white, and blue cowboy hat that now covered his greasy blond hair. He had one of those cheap star badges pinned to his vest that read I'm a Junior Sheriff! and his blank eyes had a sort of dazed look. Nothing unusual there.

"What part of 'get out' don't you understand? Go away!"

"No way! Not with all these chicks here! Are you crazy?"

"Hmph," Skye pouted, realizing that he had been insulted. "I am not female. If anyone here is a maiden, it is you- did the gay pride flag, by any chance, regurgitate on top of your misshapen head? Or perhaps you saw it fit to turn Rainbow Brite into an accessory?"

"Aww, how cute!" Rock chirped. "You're playing hard-to-get, aren't you?"

"I most certainly am not."

"Sure you are!" he retorted cheerfully. He seemed to consider something for a moment, scratching his bare chin as he did so. "Lately, most chicks have been playing hard-to-get with me. Weird, huh?"

"For the fourteenth time, I am not a 'chick', nor am I even the slightest bit infatuated with the likes of you," Skye replied, his voice starting to waver between his usual calm and irritation. "Even if, in some horrifically altered universe, I was a maiden, I would refuse to date you, not only because your head is the approximate size of a morbidly obese Beluga Whale on steroids, but also because I am otherwise romantically involved," he inclined his head towards me, a playful smile on his face. "Or, at least, will be as soon as a certain beautiful maiden comes to her senses."

Rock cocked his head to the side innocently, trying his best to process Skye's words. Then, the idiot replied with something that I plan on tormenting the Phantom Thief with for years to come.

"Good! If you have a boyfriend, then you don't have to be all sad when I have to reject you! I don't date ugly chicks, see?" he then leaned in slowly towards Skye, then whispered in his ear, "It's bad for my image, you dig?"

I laughed so hard that tears started to stream down my cheeks, and I had to hold my stomach to keep from doing a face-plant. Skye, on the other hand, was not so greatly amused. He stood there silently for a moment, staring intently at Rock, who had lost interest in the conversation and was now flexing at his reflection in the TV screen.

"Pony," The Phantom Thief said calmly, his eyes still fixated on the blonde. "About the weapon concealed under your bed... I was wondering if you might graciously loan it to me for a brief moment?"

"Skye!" I scolded through dying fits of laughter. "He's more of an idiot than you, sure, but that doesn't mean he deserves a bullet to the head!"

"Mmm. Who said anything about his head? I was thinking more along the lines of through the heart... Much more dramatic, yes? Ironic, as well."

I'd never seen him this dark before and, to be completely honest, it kind of scared me. But still, I had to give him props- he was starting to think like me.

"Shooting innocent bystanders through the heart is typically frowned upon in modern day society."

"Perhaps, but I have never been much of a stickler for rules, if you have not already noticed."

"But there are still some rules that need to be obeyed."

"And which ones might you be referring to, may I ask?"

"The ones that mention breaking into someone's house without their permission."

He smiled benevolently and shook his head, a strand of silver hair falling in his face. "I'm afraid I must disagree with that one. Unless you are referring to Fabio over there, of course."

I was about to inform him that even the great Phantom Skye was not exempt from the law, but was interrupted by yet another unwelcome visitor.

"ROCK!" a furious man screamed. Whoever it was, he had voice was so deep that I had to resist the urge to ask him to sing the brown note.

"What in the good Goddess's name are you thinking, you ignorant boy? Why, the nerve of kids these days! You. Aren't. Well!"

A squat bald man in a white lab-coat and maroon pinstriped shorts, who I recognized as Dr. Hardy after some thought, pushed past me (Out of my way, vile woman!) and hobbled over to Rock, who was now half scowling at the man and half continuing to check out his reflection.

"Get outta here, Gramps! You're cramping my style!"

"Style?" he said harshly. "Style? Pah! She has more style than you have in your little finger!" Dr. Hardy pointed an accusing finger in my direction. "And that's saying something- the abominable girl looks like she was just thrown up by a cat!" He then seized Rock's wrist and dragged the violently flailing boy out the door, his screaming protests echoing in the distance.

"That cat vomit happens to be Armani," Skye muttered, his arms crossing defiantly.

"And your Armani happens to look like cat vomit," I retorted, removing the over-sized coat and tossing it to him. "Catch."

He seemed happy enough to get it back at first, but instantly dumped it on the floor as soon as he realized that it was drenched in mud and Goddess-only-knows what else. The thief winced at his formerly clean and well-manicured hands in revulsion.

"What on Earth did you do while we were apart? Wrestle pigs, by the state of my poor designer clothing?"

"Nah," I said bitterly. "I chased the stupid Abominable Snowman through the forest."

Realizing that I sounded like I belonged in a mental institution by his amused expression, I added, "Long story."

"Mmm. It certainly sounds like it," he replied as he made himself comfortable on the couch. "But, as I mentioned earlier, I have nowhere in particular I have to be on this lovely night."

"Don't you have an old lady's purse to steal or something?" I complained, making a last feeble attempt to extricate the unwanted criminal from my home.

"Actually, no. That is on tomorrow's agenda."

I crossed my arms and scowled, to which he responded, "It is called a joke. Perhaps you have heard of them?"

"My whole life's a joke," I snorted. "I'm being stalked by a thief who thinks he's a prince."

"I prefer the term 'courting'," he chuckled.

"Okay, first of all, the two words have completely different meanings. Secondly, nobody's used that word in like two hundred years."

"Perhaps, but most sane people do not attack their innocent doors until they are reduced to a mere splinter, either."

I flipped over onto my elbows and glared daggers at him, trying to avoid the uncomfortable warmth that rushed to my cheeks. "You saw that, huh?"

"Heard it, more like. It is somewhat difficult to ignore when your girlfriend has an emotional meltdown on her front porch."

"If you value your life, you won't tell a soul."

"Oh, I don't know about that," he grinned, tapping his fingertips together like a Disney villain. "It feels rather... empowering. Flattery does not seem to work with you; perhaps blackmail is the correct way to go?"

I raised an eyebrow and slowly but intentionally began to creep my hand towards the underside of my bed. "You were saying?"

"That shooting innocent bystanders through the head is typically frowned upon in modern day society?"

"Heart, actually. Much more dramatic," I corrected him, a sly grin tugging at the corners of my mouth. I moved my hand another inch. "Still wrong, though. Try again?"

He gulped and ran his fingers nervously through his hair. "Blackmail is morally unjust, and I should be more than content to have the pleasure of merely being in your glorious presence?"

I stretched out my arms innocently with a fake yawn, as if that had been my intent all along. "A little wordy, but it'll do."

Skye narrowed his eyes suspiciously for a moment before smiling wryly. "Hmm. That's odd."

"What?" I asked curiously. "Your fashion sense?"

"No, no, that's not it at all. What I find odd is that you accepted a compliment. From me, no less."

I opened my mouth, ready to throw out a witty response or some sort of clever blow on his wardrobe, but the words didn't come. I mean, what could I say?

I could deny it, I guess, but I knew for a fact that he wouldn't buy it- Skye was actually, in rare cases, more intuitive than I gave him credit for.

I could acknowledge it, play it off as no big deal. That wouldn't work either, though. The Phantom Thief, big-headed as he was, would assume that I was, as he called it, "in denial". That I loved him, but wouldn't admit it even if my life depended on it. Which was just about as far from the truth as he could get.

Or, there was always Option #3: Change the subject.

"You said there was something you needed to tell me back in town."

His expression darkened. "Ah, yes. I suppose I did."

I waited for him to explain himself, but the room remained silent for several uncomfortable seconds. "Well, what is it? Spit it out!"

"I believe I owe you an apology."

The Prince of the Stars began pacing the floor restlessly, his hands weaved tightly together behind his back to the point that his knuckles turned an unhealthy shade of white.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Apology accepted. Now, why are you really here?"

"Hmm. We're awfully perceptive today, aren't we?" Skye asked, flashing me an apologetic smile.

"Yeah, well, it's kind of hard to ignore when your...er...friend is having an emotional meltdown in your living room."

"Hehe. You consider me a friend?"

Skye beamed, the weary expression melting from his features for a brief moment. As much as I hate to admit it, he looked kind of... cute when he smiled, like a little kid almost. There- I said it. Then, as quickly as it had begun, it was over, and he seemed to age another ten years before my eyes.

"Yes, well, all joking aside, I had ulterior motives for acting as I did. You see, I knew that I would see you again, despite what I said. It would be near impossible to stay away for long. I only hoped that I would anger you to the point that you would refuse to see me again, thereby refusing to assist me in that which I am about to ask of you. I realize that it is a lot to ask, therefore you have no obligations whatsoever to accept, and I hope you do not feel as if you do just to make things easier on my part. I would deeply appreciate it, however, if you would graciously choose to assist me in the task which-"

"You're stalling."

"Yes, well, you are aware that Mia, the Harvest Goddess's only daughter, has gone missing. Her whereabouts are currently unknown, though I have a general idea based on past occurrences."

I nodded. "The Harvest King banished the Harvest Goddess and her Sprites in the same way, but nobody knows exactly where they are."

"Correct. And you of all people should know why this was necessary."

"It wasn't my fault!" I argued, stomping my right foot in my anger. "Look, it had been a long day, and I was up until three in the freaking morning unpacking my stuff! The last thing on my mind was 'You know what? I think I'm going to wake up in three hours and go plant turnips, never mind the fact that I can barely afford food let alone seeds, it's a Saturday morning, and I can't see five feet in front of me because I'm up before the Sun!'"

"I agree wholeheartedly, dearest Pony. It was not my intention to place the blame on you, and if I did, I apologize."

"Well, you did." I said, crossing my arms automatically.

"In that case, I hope you will accept my sincerest apologies."

"Fine, whatever," I sighed. "But what I'd like to know is how you even know what happened in the first place. I thought I was the only one who knew about that, seeing as I've told nobody. You weren't 'courting' me again, were you?"

He couldn't help but let out a small chuckle, though the somber expression remained etched in his features. "It may be hard to believe, but even the infamous Phantom Thief cannot court a maiden without first knowing of her existence. No, I learned about your little incident from none other than Mia. Being somewhat of a Goddess herself, she remains 'in the loop', so to speak. Nothing major can happen in this town without her knowing about it, partially because she is an all-knowing Goddess, and partially because she just enjoys sticking her nose into other peoples' business."

"That makes sense, I guess," I agreed, though I still didn't dismiss the idea that he could've just been stalking me. "But what I really wonder is why you were harboring the Harvest Goddess's daughter in the first place. Don't you dare give me that 'it will take the mystique out of our relationship' crap, either; I swear, if I hear those words come out of your mouth one more time, I will see to it personally that every one of the threats I've made is carried out."

Skye looked between me and the floor, his eyes crinkling in his indecision. I could almost feel what he was thinking- there was something that he didn't want me to know, but at the same time he'd prefer not to be burned at the stake, either.

"Forgive me- perhaps I shall steal that old woman's purse tonight after all," he declared, stealthily moving towards the exit. "Until tomorrow, my love."

"Oh, no you don't!" I replied, forcefully seizing him by the shoulder as he tried to escape. "You're not going anywhere until I get some answers!"

"Hehe. You just can't keep your hands off of me tonight, can you?" Skye flirted, waggling his eyebrows suggestively.

I dropped my hands immediately, my expression flitting between frustration, anger, and disgust. Seizing the opportunity, he scrambled to his feet and made a mad dash for the door. I was slightly faster, however, and tackled him to the ground shortly upon realizing my mistake. I could almost hear the perverted thoughts he was no doubt directing at me, but I managed to hold my ground nonetheless.

"It appears that you've gotten the better of me," he smirked, enjoying this way too much. "For the time being, that is."

"Oh, really?" I said skeptically, digging my elbows into his back for good measure. "And why do you say that?"

He grinned like a Cheshire Cat. "You again fail to recall that I have a certain... influence over maidens such as yourself. An unfair advantage, if you will."

"You wouldn't dare!" I snarled.

"Oh, but I would. Now, if you'll excuse me..."

"Damn it!" I screamed, reluctantly letting the stupid thief squirm out of my grasp. He made a show of brushing off the one speck of dirt that stuck to his shirt and slipped out the door, but not before peeking around the frame one last time to blow me a silent kiss.

Fine. If Skye wasn't going to give me answers, then I knew of someone who could. The only problem was how to get to her, especially if she was still frozen solid in said thief's living room.

Oh, and she wanted to blow me into a million pieces. That too.


	17. Chapter 17: Point of View

**A/N: One hundred four reviews? Seriously? Wow. You guys rock! Thanks to all of those who reviewed, and also to those who faved and alerted without reviewing (You know who you are. I know you're out there! You can't hide forever, you know!) ;)**

**Secondly, I just wanted to mention an issue with italics from the last chapter. For whatever reason, they didn't show up after I published, so I apologize if it sounded weird in some parts.**

**Alright, I'm done now! With the boring part out of the way, I hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it :)**

I watched in pleasant surprise as the late-morning sunlight streamed through my window, bathing the room in a dim, comforting warmth. It was the first time I'd gotten a good night's sleep in- how long had it been? Weeks? Months? Either way, it had been a really long time. There had to be some kind of a catch- there always was.

I threw on a quick change of clothes and poked my head cautiously out the front door. A gentle flurry of snow was still drifting peacefully from the sky, lightly dusting the ground a pale white. To the right, I saw the few crops I'd managed to grow had withered and died, though from the neglect on my part or the abnormally cold weather I wasn't sure. Didn't matter either way- dead was dead. And, I reasoned with a sigh, dead also meant no profit for the season.

And, on the cheery topic of death, I still had to pay a visit to an extremely powerful witch that most likely wanted to kill and/or mutilate me beyond recognition. Charming.

_Well,_ I decided grimly. _I'd better get going._ If Skye was out tormenting innocent people during the night, he must sleep during the day. That meant that I should be able to sneak in without his knowledge, find a way to talk to Vivian (preferably without becoming a Pony shish-kabob in the process), and get the heck out of dodge, assuming that I remembered the way back. Seemed easy enough, right? Wrong.

"_Pony?_"

Oh, Goddess. It was Takakura. I'd completely forgotten about him.

He squinted at me as he emerged from his tiny shack, wrapping his arms around his chest instinctively as he was hit with the frigid air. He began trudging sluggishly through the snow in my direction; probably not the best thing to do, considering his was wearing nothing but an old tank-top and holy jeans.

"No, it _can't_ be. Dang it, I must be losing my mind in my old age!"

"Yup. You're just hallucinating. Go back to bed." I said ominously, trying to sound convincing. I mean, why not? I was going to have to sit through a boring lecture anyhow, so I might as well have a little fun. Besides, there was always the chance, as small as it was, that he'd take the whole 'hearing voices' thing as an indication that he needed to lay off the prune juice and just leave me in peace.

"Hmm. Really?" he said, his black eyes narrowing into slits as he again tried (and failed) to see through the snow. "That sounds like an awfully Pony-like thing to say, if you ask me."

"Nope. Definitely just your conscience." I said feebly, slamming and locking the door as he approached it.

I heard him heave a long, tired sigh, and then a gentle but persistent knocking reverberated throughout the tiny room.

"Pony. I'm not ignorant. I know you're in there. Open up. Now."

I considered it. Should I let him in and be subjected to hours of pointless speeches and lectures that I've heard and memorized a million times already, or should I go back to sleep in my warm, soft bed? As close of a decision as it was, I chose the latter.

"I'm not leaving this spot until you let me in. I am going to get hypothermia if you wait any longer, and you're going to be responsible for my hospital bills. I'm on your property, after all. Your crops are in horrible shape, so I doubt you'll be able to pay, either."

Why did he have to know me so well? I groaned into my pillow and slowly shuffled to the door to let him inside, a blanket still draped sloppily around my shoulders. Takakura ambled inside before lowering himself gently down onto the couch, then gestured for me to sit beside him.

"Now, Pony," he began in the "I'm disappointed in you" tone of voice that I recognized all too well from my childhood. I braced myself for the worst. He was surely going to kick me out, tell me that it was my fault for letting my crops kick the bucket. "Where is your dog?"

The question took me by surprise. I'm not complaining, though- I expected there to be a full-on interrogation, with the possibility that Takakura would find out where I'd really been and blab to the entire valley. But _this-_ this I could handle.

"No idea!" I said confidently. "Not a clue!"

"Mhmm. You sound awfully happy for someone whose dog just ran away. Especially when that particular dog was a gift from _me_."

"I wouldn't say _happy_, really, but dog ownership is a lot of work, Takakura," I defended, trying to put on my most angelic face. "I honestly don't think I'm ready for that kind of responsibility yet, being as young as I am."

"Interesting. You can't handle a dog, yet you manage to maintain an entire farm by yourself? Hmm."

I was digging my own grave. If I kept this up, I would end up begin shipped back to the city after all. I'd have to get a _real _job. Eww.

As if reading my mind, he then said, "Pony, I'm not going to evict you. I couldn't do that to my best friend's daughter. But I do want you to be more responsible; working on a farm is, well, a lot of _work_. And along with that work comes risks."

"I can take care of myself," I sighed, not without frustration. "And I'm getting seriously fed up with everyone thinking otherwise!"

"Yes, you might think so now. I was much the same way when I was your age. But the reality is that you're young. You can be foolish and irrational at times and, as sexist as this may sound, you're a woman. You need someone to protect you. Truthfully, that's why I bought your dog Ringo in the first place; I thought you would be capable of training him as sort of a guard dog, especially with all of the dangerous wildlife in this area. There are even rumors of an invincible thief who enjoys chasing after the young ladies in town. Therefore, I've decided that you do, in fact, need protection, whether it be in the form of a pet or," -the old man cleared his throat nervously- "a husband."

If there was a glass of water nearby, I would've done a spit take. I tried to argue, I really did. My brain refused to form coherent words, however, so all that came out was an unintelligible, strangled, coughing sound that reminded me of a drowning cat.

"I realize that getting married is a lot to ask of a nineteen year old such as yourself, but please hear me out. There are plenty of decent bachelors living in Forget-Me-Not! A young woman such as yourself should be able to get one of them to propose in no time."

What I meant to say was along the lines of: "I'm no scholar, but last time I checked, the definition of 'decent' was not 'borderline psychopath.'"

What came out was: "_Bachelors?"_

"Oh, yes! Of course!" he began, nodding encouragingly. "There's that charming boy, Rock, that lives at the Inn, for starters-"

"Total airhead." I dismissed with a sharp wave of my hand.

"-then, there's Vesta's apprentice, Marlin-"

"Have you _seen _the guy? That greasy hair of his could be seen from Google Earth."

"-and the travelling musician, Gustafa-"

"You're kidding, right?"

Realizing that he wasn't making any progress, he just sighed. "Think about it, okay? Please. For me."

I rolled my eyes, but cheered up considerably as he started to stand and walk towards the door. Maybe I was off the hook after all!

"Oh, and Pony?" he asked on his way out. I froze. "Don't ever scare me like that again. I'm not asking you to tell me where you've been for the past few weeks, or even where you go running off to in the future. Just let me know when you're leaving, okay? I'll even tend your crops for a while, if you need me to."

I nodded happily until I was struck with a thought. "Wait, hold up! Didn't Kai tell you where I was?"

He looked puzzled. "Kai? No. I haven't seen the kid in ages. How's he doing, anyway?"

"He's okay, I guess." I said absentmindedly. It just didn't make sense. Why would Kai tell Ruby, a woman I'd hardly ever seen before in my life, about my 'visiting distant relatives' but not even mention a word of it to one of the closest people to me in the valley? We needed to talk. Soon.

As soon as Takakura left for good, I began to dig my cell phone out of my pocket. However, the search was in vain- Skye still hadn't given it back, or even admitted that he took it in the first place, being the dirty thief he was. It was a good thing I was headed in that direction already- maybe I could find it after speaking with Vivian. _If _I could talk to her, that is. If not, Skye was getting a rude awakening.

* * *

"Get up, you lazy asshole!"

"Pony," Skye croaked groggily, not bothering to open his eyes. "To what do I owe this visit? You do realize what time it is, correct?"

"Yeah, I do, actually. It's _two in the freaking afternoon! _GET UP!"

He didn't do as I asked, instead rolling over and falling right back asleep, his snores so loud that they'd register on a seismograph. Fine. He wanted to do things the hard way? We could do things the hard way.

I pulled the drawstring on the blinds and opened the window as far as it would go without making a hole in the ceiling, letting the sun spill over his formerly sleeping face. Skye groaned sleepily and burrowed deeper under the sanctuary of the covers. A hand ventured out from under the blanket and patted the mattress searchingly until it came into contact with a spare pillow. Fingers closed around it greedily as it was lifted up and placed on top of his head, effectively shutting out all traces of light. I yanked the blankets out of his grasp and flung the stupid pillow clear across the room, revealing a very unsightly bedhead that looked like it had recently been attacked by a vacuum cleaner. Skye shivered and grasped at the air in earnest for his missing source of warmth.

"Why must you torture me so?" he asked pathetically. "Don't tell me you get some sort of sick, sadistic joy from watching me suffer like this?"

"You act like I just bought you backstage passes to a Justin Bieber concert, you drama queen," I snorted with a roll of my eyes.

"Yes, that would be considerably worse than my current predicament, wouldn't it?" he replied, a slight smile starting to tug at the corners of his lips. "That hair of his is a crime in itself; I would know, being somewhat of an adept in that particular area myself. It looks almost as his head is being mauled by half of a coconut shell. Frankly, I don't blame it."

"Says the guy sporting purple skinny jeans."

"Touche!" Skye chuckled, and I couldn't help but grin in response. He opened his eyes and sat up, his fingers intertwining as he wrapped his arms around his knees. "Now, tell me again why you have so generously graced me with your presence on this fine afternoon?"

My smile fell as soon as I remembered my ruined intentions of coming here in the first place, and it was quickly replaced with a scowl.

"You let the Witch Princess get away!"

He nodded sagely, like the news didn't surprise him in the slightest. "Yes. I supposed it was only a matter of time before she escaped, but I assure you that it was not my doing."

"What? You _expected _this?" I sighed. "What happened to being able to _control _your- well, whatever it is? Has the invincible Phantom Thief finally lost his touch?"

"I will have you know that it is called a Maiden Chick Beam, thank you very much," he said defiantly, mock hurt layered in his voice. "But Vivian _is_ the most powerful witch in existence, after all, and I am only-" he stopped mid-sentence, as if correcting himself, then finished in his usual suave manner, "-a mere thief."

"How can you be so calm about this?" I asked, stamping my foot in frustration. "I mean, I'm no expert on this sort of thing, but even _I_ know that an angry, powerful witch that could make my head go kaboom with a snap of her fingers is _not_ someone we want as an enemy."

"Hmm. If I didn't know any better, I would say that you were _frightened_ of this Witch Princess," he teased, an impish expression taking hold of his features as he smoothed down his formerly frizzy hair with his fingers. "If you are, however, know that you are welcome to stay the night. Several nights, if you are so inclined. It really is no trouble, none at all."

"Something tells me that you're not saying that out of the goodness of your heart." I snorted, flipping my ponytail in what I hoped was a 'get lost' kind of gesture.

Skye's left hand flew to his heart, and he draped the other arm over his forehead as if he were about to faint.

"My dear, lovely, gorgeous Pony! You dare accuse me of having impure motives, when all I do is offer my humble abode and protection to you willingly and with open arms, regardless of the consequences that may ensue by doing so? You wound me, my darling, you really do!"

"Good," I scoffed, my hands on my hips. "You need to be taken down a notch, if you ask me."

"Oh, really?" he asked slowly, deliberately swinging his legs over the side of the bed and hopping gracefully to the floor. "Please do not take this the wrong way, but I honestly believe that it is _you _that needs to be- how did you put it?- _taken down a notch._"

"How so?"

The playful gleam in his eyes intensified, and a matching smirk began to form as he began pacing the floor restlessly.

"From what I have seen so far-" he began confidently, "-you seem to renounce each and every bachelor in Forget-Me-Not Valley, tossing them each aside without even a second thought. Why is that, do you think?"

"That's easy," I shrugged, "They're either old enough to be my grandfather two times over, have a head as empty as a Pez dispenser, or, in one special case, have the fashion sense of a color blind hobo on an acid trip."

"So, in short, you claim that you are too good for them all?" he questioned, raising an eyebrow mischevously. "That they each in turn are undeserving of you, simply because they possess a single fault in their entire beings?"

There was a short pause. "That's not fair!" I eventually protested. "You make me sound like a total jerk when you put it like that!"

"Precisely!" he exclaimed. An air of unsaturated victory hung about him like mist as he stopped his pacing and looked me directly in the eyes. "Let's apply this concept to myself for a moment, shall we? I manage to rescue you after you are viscously mauled by a wild dog and devote myself completely and wholeheartedly to tending to your wounds, and how do you return the favor? You accuse me of kidnapping, threaten to turn me into the authorities, and then promise to incinerate my corpse beyond recognition and dance on the ashes. From your viewpoint, your actions seem somewhat justifiable; after all, I abducted you without permission and whisked you off to the middle of the woods while you were unconscious and unable to make decisions for yourself. It would be only natural to defend yourself, then proceed to have your stunningly attractive abductor (namely, yours truly) locked up for his crime so as to prevent the same fate from befalling others. However, from my own point of view, I was heroic. I quite possibly saved your life by acting as I did, therefore _my _actions seemed justifiable at the time."

"So... you're saying that I should give the other guys a chance?"

My mouth fell open so wide that I was surprised my jaw didn't hit the floor. I know that I should've been happy that he was being so lenient (not that he dictated my actions), but was he _actually_ giving up on me? The thought made my shoulders droop. All of those months of persistent'courting', only to toss me aside like an old piece of garbage. Gee, thanks. Way to boost my self esteem.

"One in particular, yes."

I was surprised as I found that I had been holding my breath, and I let out a long, relieved sigh. I was even more surprised when I realized how close Skye had gotten during our conversation, and even more so as he brushed something wet off of my cheek. I smacked his hand away instinctively, and he just let it drop limply to his side, his lips curved into a smile from some hidden joke.

"Fifth stage," he declared complacently. "Depression."

And then, without warning, he took another quick stride forward. A scene briefly flashed before my eyes of our second meeting in the Blue Bar, a similar situation which had ended with his trying to make a move. My eyes widened in shock as I realized what he was doing, and I frantically readied myself to kick him where the sun don't shine if he even _dared _to make a move, to take just one more measly step forward...

The seconds ticked by, and still nothing happened. He just stood there brazenly, observing me expectantly as if to say "Well? What are you waiting for?" What was he doing? Just who did he think that he was? Did he actually expect _me_ to make a move on _him_? Well, _that_ was never going to happen. There was a greater chance of Rock using a word that contained more than two syllables. I began to tell him so, unleashing these feelings in a rant that put Billy Mays to shame.

Somewhere around the five minute mark, however, I could tell by his expression that something was wrong.

"-and do you _honestly _expect me to date a guy who wears pants that are tighter than mine? I mean, come on! You give even Steve Urkel a run for his money, and furthermore- what?"

He was staring, transfixed, over my shoulder, his face so pale that even _I_ began to worry.

"Go." Skye said abruptly. All traces of sympathy that I possessed a moment ago evaporated into thin air.

"Nuh-uh! Are you seriously kicking me out? Well, you've got another thing coming, Mr. I-endangered-the-entire-leopard-species-to-create-my-wardrobe, because I'm not leaving until- no, I _refuse _to leave this spot until you let me finish!"

"_Go!_" he repeated, this time with more resolve. He seized my arm and, despite my frantic kicks and protests, violently dragged me all the way to the open window as if to throw me out of it. Despite the building being only one story, something tells me that being hurled out of a window wouldn't exactly leave me dancing in the streets.

"_Skye!_" I shouted. "What the hell do you think you're doing? It's called a _door!_ It's there for a reason!"

His jaw set obstinately as the struggle continued, he trying in vain to shove me out the window, and me trying to land a kick to his face. Suddenly, he stopped, frozen to the spot as if paralyzed. I made a show of brushing myself off, and I felt my face heat up in fury.

"Are you insane?" I snapped. He still hadn't moved, and I tried snapping my fingers in front of his face to get his attention... but my arm wouldn't budge. I tried again. Still nothing. I attempted to kick my leg out, shrug my shoulders, touch my toes, speak, _anything_, but nothing worked. It was as if time had frozen me in place.

There was a chilling laughter from behind me, one that would have given me goosebumps had I not been rooted to the spot.

"What a show!" a familiar voice laughed. "Bravo! Well done! Encore!"

The voice paused, as if waiting for a response.

"Oh, right! Silly me! Hold on a second!"

One second, I was facing the wall; the next, a woman. Her hair was platinum blond, and her eyes a piercing red, like the farthest depths of Hell.

"Hey there, Pony!" the Witch Princess greeted cheerfully. "Miss me?"

**A/N: I hope I didn't offend any Justin Bieber fans out there! If I did, let me know and I'll gladly change it :)**


	18. Chapter 18: Stubborn

**A/N: Hi, everyone! Again, thank you SO much for the reviews and alerts- you guys have no idea how much they make my day! :)**

**I really don't have much else to say at the moment, so... I hope you like this chapter, too, and thanks to my beta harvestgrl for correcting my atrocious spelling! :D**

"Y'know," Vivian continued, blissfully unaware of the murderous thoughts being directed her way. "I've heard good things about you, Pony. Really good things. See, from what I've heard, you're strong-willed. Resourceful. Stubborn. You've got all the makings of someone powerful, someone _wealthy_, and what do you do? You not only decide make enemies with me- _me_ of all people_,_ the all-powerful, omniscient Witch Princess!- but you also run off with the walking Shakespeare production himself!"

The comment, as did most implying that I intentionally ran off with that idiot thief, invoked a sort of blinding fury. As if I'd ever even _consider _running away with _him! _I mean, I know that looks aren't everything, but _come on!_ I could easily find more attractive guys in the pharmacy isle at the supermarket, for Goddess's sake!

A more logical part of me, on the other hand, kind of wondered where she might be going with this. After all, the hag wouldn't have trekked all the way to Goddess-knows-where for no reason. If she'd meant to kill me, I inferred with relief, then it would've been over by now; I'd be as dead as a doornail the moment she walked through the door. _Or... maybe she _did _come here to kill me_, my more pessimistic side argued. Maybe she was doing the whole cliche-melodramatic-villain-monologue thing. It wouldn't surprise me if she was- after what I'd seen the past few days, I half expected a flying chimpanzee in a party hat to come crashing through the roof.

"Well! This is no fun, now is it? _Bo-ring!_" The Witch Princess remarked after an uncomforatable silence, her expression vaguely resembling a pouting toddler who didn't get her way. With a snap of her fingers, Skye materialized at my side. At least, I was ninety-nine-point-nine percent sure it was him- in my peripheral vision, I was blinded by a vibrant purple the same color as his hideous jeans. His shoulder brushed mine, almost soothingly, and I held on to the gesture as the one constant (not to mention at least _partially_ normal) thing in my life, desirable or not. "Let's see what Skyler has to say, shall we?"

She clapped twice, almost theatrically, and I felt Skye stiffen as the spell formerly holding him in place was gradually broken. He hesitated at first, seemingly surprised by the easy chance to escape, but eventually used what little common sense he posessed and seized the opportunity. Clumsily scooping me up in his arms, he began making a break for the still-open window, from which a gentle breeze was still flowing, happily unaware of the current predicament inside. Unfortunately for me, Skye was more concerned with speed than with my comfort, and I ended up in a very uncomfortable and somewhat awkward position with my toes somewhere behind my head and my arms dragging on the ground like limp noodles. Humiliating? Sure. But it was a hell of a lot better than being turned into a pile of Pony-mush, in my opinion.

However, as usual the pretty boy couldn't do anything right.

Before he'd traveled more than five steps, he was already flat on his face, feet smoking from the red beam of energy that tripped him up and ruined our means of escape. Courtesy of the Bipolar platinum blonde, of course, who was now laughing mirthfully and scowling at the same time. Go figure.

I kind of zoned out after that, to be honest. First of all because I'd probably screw things up even more if I was coherant. I witnessed firsthand what happened to anyone who screwed with the Witch Princess, and I'd prefer not to be a grease-mark on the floor anytime soon if I can help it. Secondly, because I truly couldn't help it. Skye wasn't the only one who was shot down by the hag, after all. Whereas he was lucky enough to have his inflated head to cushion his fall like a pillow of feathers, I was sent sprawling into the wall. Not _just _the wall, though. Oh, no. Apparently, that's not emotionally scarring enough. No, I crashed into the frame of the window, just inches from precious freedom. It was like life was taunting me, making a cruel joke of my existance.

Ah, the joys of inertia. It's times like these that I really hate science.

Surprisingly, though, the impact wasn't what got me so much as the landing. Now, I'm not saying banging your head on the wall at forty miles an hour doesn't hurt or anything, because it does. A lot. I strongly suggest not trying it at home. However, when you were recently reduced to a bloody mass by a rabid dog, and said recieved near-fatal wounds are torn opened again after you land at an angle even a contortionist would have trouble replicating, you've got an even bigger problem on your hands. Namely, a giant, most likely nasty-looking gash.

I had no trouble succumbing to unconsciousness after that. Why deal with the pain when I can just sleep it off, like I did the first time? It was a relief to be rid of the real world, anyways, if only for a few days or so. Things just were not going my way lately, what with a megalomaniac witch trying to exact revenge in presumably the most painful manner possible, an overly-dramatic convict professing his undying/eternal/marginally more than a little creepy love for me, etc. etc. Darkness clouded my vision, and I embraced it eagerly.

Unconscious or not, I could tell I was being jipped when I came to what couldn't have been more than a few minutes later. Instantly, a searing pain unlike anything I'd ever believed possible overtook all of my senses, and it took all of my self control not to cry out, not to show weakness, not to draw attention to myself. The wound throbbed painfully, each _thump_ prominant in my ears and sending a fresh round of tremors. Tenderly, I raised a shaky hand to caress the wound, and immediately regretted it as a fresh wave of pain erupted, as if someone took a branding iron to my neck. I recoiled my arm in shock, and gasped as I caught a quick glimpse of my hand. A dense, red liquid now coated the entire thing, ominously constrasting with my ghostly white skin. Blood. _My _blood. By the looks of things, I didn't have much to lose either. I had to get out, and fast- the only question now was how to do so.

Being able to stand would probably be a nice start. Experimentally, I bent my legs and shifted some of my weight to my feet. No extra pain there. So far, so good. Slowly, carefully, I slid my arms behind my back and began sitting up, taking immense care not to make any noise.

Wait, hold up- I could move?

Questioningly, I clenched and unclenched my toes, not believing what I was seeing. No stiffness, no resistance- _nothing! _I could _move! _Did that mean that the Witch Princess had left? No, she couldn't have. I strained my ears and could barely pick out her shrill laughter, though it sounded faint and murky, like I was underwater. Then, another voice; this one was more masculine, but only slightly.

"Please," Skye's silky voice pleaded, desperation and hysteria conflicting for dominance in his tone. "Please, let her go. She's done you no harm!"

"No can do, lover boy," the hag chirped cheerfully. "That wasn't part of our little deal. You're not going back on your word, _now are you?_"

Translation: Cross me, and there'll be literal hell to pay.

I knew that I should've been making a run for it right about now instead of trying to decipher the conversation, but her words kept me rooted to the spot. What _word? _He would never make a deal with... with _her! _Would he?

"At no time did you specify _this _as part of the deal!" he growled. "She's dying! She is dying, and it's _your _fault, Vivian! Just look at her, and tell me that she isn't!"

My breath caught in my throat. _No, don't mind me! _I thought desperately. _No need to look. I'm fine, really I am! Just rainbows and sunshine over here! _Without thinking, I swung my head around to glare at the thief who gave me away, and was met with another sharp wave of pain. I gritted my teeth as stars danced before my eyes, and colors began to distort reality into what looked like another one of Skye's abstract portraits. I fought unconsciousness despite my better judgement, knowing that I wouldn't get out of here if I succumbed, and steadily I managed to bring everything back into focus, though it still looked like I was viewing the scene through a kalidoscope. The hag hadn't shifted her gaze from Skye, which was definitely a plus. However, said thief most likely knew of my current situation by his flickering emotions of hope and disbelief, which created a ridiculous expression that reminded me vaguely of an old cartoon character. Our eyes met for a brief moment and, realizing his error, it quickly melted back into one of desperation and grief.

"Skyle, Skye, Skye!" The Witch Princess tutted knowingly. Her eyes glittered mischievously behind her long lashes, though a bead of sweat trickled down her flawless face as she seemingly tried to keep Skye in check, who was squirming under the rapid deterioration of her spell. "You know very well that I always hit my mark. I _know_ what I did; there's no need to double check the result when I already know for a fact what it is!"

"So you _meant_ to kill her?" he snarled. There was slightly less venom in his tone, I noted briefly, but still enough to sound plenty convincing.

"Nah," she responded casually, as if she were speaking of what she had for lunch today rather than my homicide. "A nice thought, though; I'll have to keep it in mind. Just wanted calm her down a bit 'till I could get her back to my place, is all."

Oh, goody. I get to go to the hag's for a sleepover, apparently. I idly began to picture different scenarios, even though my mind kept nagging me to get out, to get moving, to go home! I pushed the thought to the side; I could spare a few minutes to recover my strength a little, right? Besides, I wanted to know a little more about this so-called "deal". I wondered if she lived in an old tower, like in the old stories. Or maybe it was a cute little gingerbread house in the middle of the woods, like from Hansel and Gretel? _Well, at least that way I'd be properly fed, _I thought, not without amusement. I smirked a little at the mind picture of the Princess in a frilly pink dress, beckoning and waving to little children who were unlucky enough to walk by. I pictured the little cottage that smelled of freshly baked cookies, and the frosting that would neatly line the walls in cute little swirly patterns, the solid, dark chocolate door... Oh, Goddess, I was _hungry! _I hadn't eaten a decent meal in forever! Now that I think of it, I hadn't eaten a _meal_ in forever! My stomach growled in protest.

"What was that?" Vivian trilled. Her stiff blonde hair shifted slightly as she made to turn her head, and I immediately played dead to avoid suspicion. _Ow! _I thought irritably, trying desperately not to make any sign that I was awake. I pursed my lips to stifle a rising curse; my gut told me that the typical unconscious person didn't scream bloody murder till their voice gave out. "I _know _that I heard-"

Abruptly her voice cut off, like someone took the needle off of an old record player. My hopes began to rise. Did Skye really do it? Maybe, while she momentarily lost her concentration on the spell holding him in place, he took her out. That _must _be it! Huh. He really did something right for once, didn't he? He actually saved us. He saved _me_.

_No, that's ridiculous, _I scolded myself. I would've gotten myself out of this somehow; I must be going soft from hanging around so many prissy drama queens lately. Despite this, though, I had to admit that I felt a grudging respect towards the formerly incompetent thief for making my overly-complicated life that much easier. I smiled in spite of the pain and gradually worked my way to my feet, though my legs trembled with the effort and my mind reeled from excess blood loss. I resisted the urge to vomit, knowing that that definitely wasn't the proper way to thank someone for saving you. I could just picture it: "Thanks a lot for saving my life, Skye! Now, I'm not only going to ruin another one of your hideous shirts, but also make you smell like an onion ate garlic and then threw up in a sewer!" Yeah, not cool.

What actually _did _happen, on the other hand, might as well have been the opposite of a rescue attempt. Rockhead was ten times more heroic than Skye running around in his Rainbow-Brite hat with a sheet tied around his scrawny neck. In fact, even if I _did, _but any chance, happen to witness a chimpanzee in a party hat crashing through the roof, it wouldn't even come _close_ to what I was seeing on the impossible scale.

To put it simply, the two were making out right in front of me, right smack in the middle of the room. Just...well... _making out! _I just stood there silently for a few moments, watching as the hag tangled her fingers in his still-messy silver hair, and as he hesitantly (or was I just hallucinating?) wrapped his pale arm around her waist. It was impossible, yet there it was, happening right before my eyes. Soon, the cool neutrality morphed into flat-out fury. The formerly blinding pain was now as significant as a tiny splinter compared to my infinite hatred for that _witch_. Only one thought occupied my mind now: I wanted to kill her. I _would_ kill her, even if I ended up killed myself by doing so. I simply didn't care, so long as _she_ went down with me, I would die happily!

Silently as a predator stalking helpless prey, I crept up behind the demonic blonde. I remained indifferent as Skye began frantically glancing between me and the window and even throwing in a few clumsy gestures with the hand that remained concealed behind the witch. I remained focused on the task at hand, as I had completely ditched the notion that the inconsiderate criminal wanted to save me at all; it was clear that he just wanted me to leave so he could have some alone time with his stupid girlfriend. _Enjoy it while it lasts, you traitor, _I thought bitterly. I crouched, preparing to leap at the Witch Princess and rip her ugly throat out. At once, Skye stopped trying to convince me to leave and closed his eyes in defeat, a silent tear leaving a trail on his cheek before gravity took over and carried it gently to the floor. _That's right, _I thought with satisfaction as he finally shoved her away with disgust._ You're next._

With all of the speed and force I possessed, I leapt on the hag's shoulders and clawed at her face like an angry cat. She screamed in outrage and shock before plucking me off of her by the scruff of my neck as if I _was, _in fact, a cat, throwing me down on the floor like I weighed no more than one, either. All of the former pain came rushing back like a tidal wave, and this time I couldn't help screaming as the blood flowed freely from the wound and dyed my formerly white shirt scarlet.

I began to realize just how hopeless the whole situation was. Who was I kidding? I was no match for the Witch Princess. I wasn't a predator anymore, or even a cat: I was a helpless little kitten, being manipulated and used by all sides like a puppet. I gasped for air as the screams used up my entire supply of oxygen, and I briefly wondered how I would die first: blood loss, or suffocation? As it was, I wasn't conscious long enough to find out. An ominous red beam of light was fired right between my eyes, and Vivian's furious voice echoed in my head as the formerly suppressed darkness rushed eagerly to cloud my thoughts.

"Good night, you little brat! Enjoy it while you can, because I'll tell you right now that you won't be so cocky once _I'm_ through with you!"


	19. Chapter 19: Stuck

**A/N: Believe it or not guys, I'm not dead, but I might be by the time I finish this thing! I'm a horrible author, aren't I? Some of my favorite authors make it a point to update once a week, and here I am, updating- what?- once every few months? Wow. I'm sooooo sorry, everyone! Seriously! Thanks for continuing to support me through your reviews and alerts despite this, and feel free to blow up my inbox if my updates are slow!**

**Alright, now for point number two. I've had mixed reviews over the summary to this story; some of you absolutely love it, and others... well, don't. So. It would help a lot if you'd tell me what you think either through a review, a private message, or by voting in the poll on my profile! You don't have to, of course, but it would be awesome if you'd help me out! :) **

**Also on my profile is a section labeled "Projects", and I post updates weekly on how close I am to completing the next chapter in Immunity. If any of you guys would ever be interested in that, it's there!**

**(Update- 8/26) For whatever reason, some of the spaces between paragraphs were deleted once this was posted, so I'm going back through to fix that now. Sorry, guys! Let me know if you find any more mistakes!**

**Aaaand now *drum roll please* I present to you... Chapter 19! Thanks to my awesome beta, harvestgrl, for correcting my mistakes that I somehow manage to make even with a spell-check! :D**

It's amazing how much of a difference there is between being unconscious and just falling asleep. Sleeping, as you've probably already figured out for yourself, is a hell of a lot more pleasant. You doze off for a few hours, maybe even dream a little, and then poof! You wake up feeling like a million bucks, not remembering nor remotely caring about anything that happened while you were out. Unconsciousness, on the other hand, is more like being in limbo between real life and- well, nothing. It's almost like everything is functioning except for your brain- which is probably fairly accurate in my case, seeing as I was hit square in the noggin with Goddess-only-knows what (I was still kind of fuzzy on the whole witchcraft thing, seeing as Skye didn't take the time out of his oh-so-precious day to explain it to me). I could hear things, sure, and could probably see everything that was going on around me, too, had I not closed my eyes just before my brain got turned into mush, but it was all worthless because I couldn't process any of it, or reflect on it, either.

So, basically, the point I'm trying to get across here is that when I awoke disoriented and extremely confused in an unknown place with a short, balding guy in a strange little suit hovering over me, I came to three possible conclusions- none of them correct, I might add, but hey. One: I'd somehow ended up in the Land of Oz, and this guy and his pals were going to prance around singing about lollipops and a magical place called Munchkin Land. Two: Ryan Seacrest now stalks me openly. Great. Like I didn't have enough of those to begin with. And, finally, three: I was about to be offered a new puppy and all the candy I could eat if I got in this guy's dirty, windowless van. Judging solely by his appearance, I wouldn't put it past the guy.

"Hey! Pony!" he chirped loudly. The noise echoed loudly, sending choruses of the two simple words bouncing around the room like a game of telephone. As I looked around for the first time, I discovered that, like the floors, the walls of this somewhat small room were also made of some sort of stone- concrete, maybe?- that not only contained the sound, but amplified it, too. I sat up stiffly so that I could look the guy square in the face. Something about those beady little eyes looked familiar, but I couldn't remember for the life of me why. "Here is the ball you lost!"

I stared at his outstretched palm- or rather the spherical object inside of it- in disbelief. That was my dog's ball, sure enough. But did I ever lose it? Yeah, I think I did. Maybe? I searched my brain for the distant memory. There was something about the woods... And a tent... And a thief. Definitely something about a thief.

A thief. Skye. I casually glanced to the side, expecting to see him boyishly smoothing back his silvery hair, or cocking an eyebrow, or just being plain annoying in general, but my searching gaze was met only with drab, gray walls. Well, actually, there was also a green, foul-smelling substance that clung stubbornly to the wall and seemed to creep up the side of it like ivy, but I tried my best not to pay attention to that for the sake of my remaining sanity.

"Try not to lose it this time," he said, forcing my hand open and then securely closing my grasp around the toy. He then patted my hand affectionately, as if rewarding a dog who just learned a new trick, before his gaze turned critical. "You got it, right?"

"Oh yeah, I've 'got it' alright, considering you just forced the slobbery thing onto me!" I growled. How dare he not only talk to me like I was a dumb animal, but also give me an old, chewed up ball on top of it and then reward me for taking it! I started to get fed up with this guy, so I did the logical thing: I chucked the ball at his head. I was "rewarded" yet again when his stupid glasses fell to the floor and shattered into several pieces. He sighed and bent over to retrieve the ball, being overly cautious of the glass fragments that now littered the floor.

"I said not to lose it, now didn't I?" the short man asked patiently, holding out the ball yet again for me to take. When I didn't, he just shrugged, set the thing down beside me, and bent over to scoop the glass shards into his open palm. I saw a bead of red blossom towards the bottom of his index finger, but if it hurt, he didn't complain. "I can't leave any evidence that I was here, you see. If she- the Princess, I mean- found out, then... well, let's try not to think about that!"

I didn't stop him when he made for the other side of the room. I mean, why should I? It wasn't like he was going anywhere. This whole room was just that- a room. No doors, no windows- not even a chimney to climb up, if I was that desperate!

Well, it turns out that I was wrong. In fact, this was one of the biggest mistakes I'd ever made- not following the guy, I mean. If I'd have been just a few steps closer to him, just a few more centimeters, then maybe I'd have escaped. Maybe I could have lived at least a semi-normal life, where my main concerns were avoiding both the deadly songs of a deluded stalker hippie and any form of physical work as much as possible. Heck, I could've even dealt with Skye, even though he was obviously fruitier than a Dole factory and got on my nerves to the point that I'd almost rather have stayed in that room forever than have had to deal with his antics again… Almost.

As it was, I didn't have much of a choice in the matter. The awkward man seemed to grab something invisible, turn it clockwise, pull it upwards, and then- I kid you not- walk straight through the solid wall. Now, normally, any person with a brain bigger than Rock's would have deduced that it wasn't exactly common for people to walk through walls- unless, of course, that person was on enough drugs to kill Godzilla or had some serious mental issues. Seeing as I fell under both categories (after all, Skye apparently gave me enough "medicine" to keep me under for a whole season), I scrambled to my feet and rushed to follow him- only to be met with a slam. Well, two slams actually; one was from my skull being introduced to the solid concrete, and the other from what sounded a little similar to a door shutting.

I laid there for what seemed like an eternity. How could there be a door, but not be a door? There had to be a way out- the midget guy made it out unscathed, and I had to have entered somehow! Frustrated, I kicked up at the not-door. I heard the clang of metal (and felt it too- I'm pretty sure I jacked up my toe), and was surprised when a small object landed on my thigh. I reached out and was surprised to feel the familiar, cool brass of what felt similar to the doorknob of my front door. Minus the rust, of course.

Wait- a doorknob? I eventually put two and two together and felt pleased with myself when I discovered the circular, doorknob-sized hole that let in a trickle of natural light, which was a nice change from the dimly lit space. I discarded the knob over my shoulder, not really caring how or why it worked, only how I wasn't hallucinating, and that I could somehow use the hole to escape. I stuck my hand through it and tugged on the side, hoping that the door would open without the handle. My hopes were dashed.

"Of course it won't be that easy!" I said to myself sarcastically. Nothing ever was, after all- especially when I was involved. "It was stupid of me to think that a _freaking door_ would do what it was created for in the first place and _open_!" By this point, I was fed up with being trapped. It was clear that brute force wasn't going to get me anywhere, so it was time to use my wits. _If_ I had any left, that is.

The best thing to do was probably to figure out where I was, and if there was anyone nearby to help. I crouched down and squinted through the hole, trying to match the surroundings with anywhere familiar. The ground was paved, which was definitely a good thing. Paved ground usually equals civilization. Unless, of course, you were me, in which case you were trapped in solitary confinement. I was surprised that nobody had forced one of those full-body restraints on me yet, the ones that they use to confine the seriously messed up people. I'd be joining their ranks soon if someone didn't let me the hell out of here!

_Stay focused_, I scolded myself. Anger wasn't going to get me out of there... unless, of course, I suddenly got one of those adrenaline bursts. I'd heard of mothers lifting cars off of their children, and of athletes using them to score the winning goals... I'm sure that I wouldn't have a problem punching through a wall...

I cursed. I was even more disconcerted than I thought. There would be hell to pay when I got out of there.

After a few more unsuccessful tries, I resorted to talking to myself to maintain my focus. Yeah, yeah, I know- I was further supporting my "I-belong-in-a-loony-bin" theory. But hey, it helped! At least nothing was talking back- at least, not for a while. But I'll get to that in a minute.

Alright, back to the outside world. There was a large oak tree a few yards away, whose leaves had long since died and fallen to litter the ground in a multicolored blanket. Oak trees were really common in Forget-Me-Not, so at least I hadn't been moved too far. Huh. I never thought I'd be thankful for one of Gustafa's songs about the local plant life, but I was eating my words- Er, thoughts. Whatever.

"Stay focused!" I murmured, a little louder than usual. This time, I put my ear up to the hole. I strained to hear voices, footsteps, anything, but the sound of trickling water dominated over everything else. Frustrated, I decided to look around again, but this time shifted my position so I could look to the sides. To the right, there was what looked like a steel fence. Interesting… Did that mean that I was on someone's property?

It was when I looked to the left, however, that I figured out exactly where I was.

I almost didn't believe my eyes when I saw the fountain. It was just as I remembered it- tall and imposing, with pictures of seashells carved ornately into the base. I briefly remembered coming here from the city to play as a child, back when Lumina and I were close. Her grandmother, Romana, treasured the fountain above even her granddaughter, and bragged to me about it whenever she could, but we used to sneak out once she was asleep and go swimming. It was the size of a pool, after all, so why not use it as one?

But, surprisingly, the thing I remembered most about it happened recently; about a season ago, in fact. I was hit with a door. The culprit claimed to be a "Prince of the Stars", but I seriously doubted- and still doubt- that. After all, weren't princes supposed to be gentlemen? I mean, he had the self-centered thing down pat, but they are supposed to open doors for women, not ram them into their faces. And he had the nerve to question why I wouldn't love him back! What an idiot!

I carefully poked at the biggest bruise I'd received that night, hit with a sudden wave of nostalgia. It briefly faded at my touch, but the color that rushed back this time was a greenish-yellow, and barely even that, not dark purple as it had been. It was healing, unlike most of the others- the new ones, the ones inflicted from none other than the hag. I half smiled because it looked kind of like I tie-dyed my skin; what was left of its natural color looked ghostly compared to the multi-colored blotches and dried blood that now covered almost every inch of my body. I must've been a sight. I felt like Medusa; I was such a mess that anyone who saw me would have turned to stone. Smirking a little, I silently hoped that the first person I'd run into after I got of out the dump would be Skye. Maybe I could even display him outside of my farm as a warning to the other old geezers- excuse me, bachelors- who were interested. Which, unfortunately, included half of the population of Forget-Me-Not. FML.

"Dear Goddess, is it seriously this difficult to concentrate on saving my ass?" I screamed, pounding my fists uselessly on the "door". "Can I really not open a door to save my life?"

"Did you try saying 'open sesame'?" said a muffled voice. I couldn't help glancing around, even though I was fairly certain I was blocking he only entrance to this place. Upon confirming that no one else was in the room, I glared skeptically at the door.

"Great. _Just_ great. What is this, PeeWee's frickin' Playhouse? Is the floor going to start singing nursery rhymes next?"

"Nah, I doubt it," the voice said casually. I realized that the source was the other side of the room- the place where I started- so I backtracked and put my ear up to the wall, quickly moving towards the source of the familiar sound. I now knew who was speaking, but I quickly buried the thought for fear of what happened to him. The last thing I needed was another distraction. "'Course, I'm known 'round these parts for my beautiful singing voice, so I'd be happy to oblige..." he trailed off thoughtfully. "Well, actually, I'm known for a _lot_ of things, but that's the only one appropriate enough to voice. 'Specially in the presence of a lady. If you can call yourself that, I mean. You're more manly that I am, and that's saying something. All of the women in town practically fall at my feet!"

"That they do!" I agreed, grinning in spite of the situation. I'd found the source of the noise by this point, but even so, I had to strain to make out his words. "But maybe because your ideal first date is going to the bar to take shots. Not everyone has your tolerance for alcohol, you know."

"Ouch. That's a low blow!" he chirped a bit too cheerfully for someone who's just been insulted. "But that's okay. I know you talk smack because you're jealous that you can't have me for yourself."

"Hit the nail on the head with that one. Didn't you know? I'm an active advocate for incest."

"Nope, I didn't. But then again, I guess there are a lot of things I don't know about you, Pony."

There was a pause. I guess we couldn't pretend like nothing was happening forever, but it was nice to forget, if only for a minute.

"Kai-" I began, but my explanation was cut short.

"Look, I ain't asking you to explain. Well, actually I am- but later. And when I say explain, I don't mean those crappy, monosyllabic answers that you're so fond of- I'm talking novel length, ya hear?"

"You sound like a high school girl!" I snickered.

"Guess it's my feminine side coming out. That's why the ladies love me! But, back on topic, I need to find a way out of here. Fast. That Princess or whatever is planning something big, I just know it, and I don't wanna stick around to find out what it is."

"I hear that!" I said, shivering at what Vivian could possibly need us both for. I quickly explained to him about the door.

"...Oh. So you're... stuck here too, huh?" Kai said loudly, but I could hear his voice shake a little behind the bravado. "I was actually kinda hoping that you were on the outside, so you could go for help and all..."

"Ditto," I sighed. "I think I normally would've been able to find a way out of here by now, but my brain's all screwed up. I can't concentrate."

"As you know, I would usually say something sarcastic about that, but now's really not the time. The same thing's happening to me- can't concentrate on a thing to save my life. She's putting somethin' in my food- I'm almost sure of it! It just tastes weird. Seriously, Pony, it's like Vivian goes dumpster diving to find things for me to eat! It makes that glop they serve in prison look like it was prepared by Gourmet himself. I offered to cook and everything, but she got all offended, and threatened to shove an apple in my mouth and serve _me_ next, and... well, I kind of shut up after that. I think you're on to something with the doors, though. I saw one too, on this side, but didn't think much of it, to be honest. I reckon we can use 'em to our advantage, if we play things carefully. But we can't let her_ know_ that we know, y'know? I-"

"Let me know _what_, now?" Vivian asked casually.

I whirled my head around at the sound of her voice, acknowledging the blinding pain that accompanied the movement with nothing more than a slight grimace. She stood just a few feet away with her hands clasped behind her back, rocking back and forth innocently on the balls of her feet, like she was guilty of nothing other than eavesdropping. I just hoped that she didn't hear too much. Judging by her simple question, I didn't think she did. At least, I sincerely hoped so.

"Oh, don't look so surprised! Hel-lo! Princess of Witches here! What did you think the name meant, huh? I keep forgetting I have to explain everything since you're just a little girl; you've put up quite a fight so far, let me tell you!"

"And I keep forgetting that you're a crusty old hag," I responded through gritted teeth, resisting the urge to wipe the sly smile off of her face. I would've done it, too, if I wasn't so weak and disoriented. That just made me hate her even more. I was never weak. _Never_. I faked a smile, and tried to extract the venom out of my voice to sound as innocent and nonchalant as she did. "Oh, wait! No I don't! It's pretty difficult to ignore those crow's feet of yours. They're so deep I think you're starting to make the Grand Canyon jealous."

A look of pure hatred crossed her face and, for a brief moment, I thought she was going to kill me then and there. Flames seemed to spring to life from her already-scarlet eyes, burning red, and orange, and gold, and they glinted with a menacing sort of glee. She held my gaze for a moment, and I couldn't look away, even if I wanted to. But I wouldn't have even if she let me. I refused to let her break me mentally, even if she already had physically.

But she doesn't kill me, obviously.

Somehow, that scared me more than if she had.

In a sudden cloud of smoke, she vanished, but I could have sworn that her eyes lingered just a moment longer than the rest of her.

And that's when I heard the blood-curdling scream.


	20. Chapter 20: Introductions

**Hmm. I'm not too sure about this, you guys. See, this chapter is not beta-ed, so it may be kind of scary to read. But, I mean, it_ is_ Halloween, so I guess this is my own little version of a Haunted House? I've tried to make one before in my garage, but it was a total disaster. Seriously. There's only so much scaring a bunch of little eleven-year-olds with a $20 budget from their combined allowance money can do, as we soon found out. On the plus side, we did make a four year old boy dressed as Spider-man run away crying, leaving a small trail of candy as he fled (they _were_ Almond Joys- aka "Old People Candy", as we referred to it- but it was still chocolate!). Or maybe that's a minus, because I'll tell you right now that it was pretty sad. Still, I'll go ahead and say that our little fourth-grade minds just about exploded with pride afterwards!**

**BUT- back on topic- sorry in advance for any spelling/grammar/overall errors! Let me know if you find anything worth mentioning, either in a review, a message- whatever! I won't hate you, I promise! :) And, as soon as I hear back from my beta, I'll be sure to repost the chapter with everything fixed. I just thought that it had been a while since I published the last one, and I haven't heard from my beta in weeks so, y'know, why not? :P**

**Oh- and Happy Halloween, of course! :D**

As I mentioned earlier, it's not exactly top-secret information that human beings weren't made to walk straight through walls. In fact, I'm pretty sure they were created to do just the opposite: to keep people out. But, in that moment, I simply didn't care. I was going through the damn wall. It didn't matter whether I was going to walk right through the thing like it was made of air, hurl my slobber-infested ball at it 'till the bacteria ate every last bit of rock away, or even use my head as a makeshift battering ram, like in all of the action movies. I was going to win this thing. I was going to save my brother. Oddly enough, it actually _worked._

See, the wall wasn't there anymore, and thankfully it wasn't because I crushed it with my skull. Instead, it might as well have been made of water vapor, but probably not even that. I passed harmlessly through, even though I could've sworn on my remaining sanity that it was solid concrete not five minutes ago. I didn't really care about that, though. Not now. My thoughts were on Kai as I sprinted into the prison cell in which he was supposedly being held captive. I wasn't disappointed. The sad part is that I think I would have been better off if I had been.

This new room was mostly dark, but not so much so that I couldn't see. Not that there was much to see, of course- just the same ol' five star accommodations that I'd become accustomed to thus far. It was dimly lit, but barely even that, almost as if it were being lit by a single, flickering candle flame. It was nearly identical to my room (as sad as it is that I referred to it as that), except for one thing: my brother, who was lying in a mangled heap on the floor.

His right leg was twisted unnaturally- so far outward that it made me flinch just looking at it- and that wasn't even the worst of it, not by a long shot. I shot forward so fast that I almost did a somersault in midair, and I hurled myself to the ground at his side, ignoring the sting of scraping my knees in the process. I flipped Kai over so that he was lying flat on his back, and I clenched my fists in anger when I spotted the scarlet stains that dominated his formerly white undershirt. His deep-set brown eyes- normally taunting and shining with laughter- were lifeless and vacant, sort of like the creepy little porcelain dolls that you somehow always manage to see at every old lady's house in the world. His chest didn't rise or fall, not even a little.

He was dead. Vivian killed him. Now, I was going to kill her.

The thought made me giddy, and I let out a short, strangled laugh, though it sounded more like a gargle than anything else. I reached over my brother's lifeless body and pulled his eyelids shut, not caring remotely as my shirt absorbed even more of the red liquid. It was already ruined, so why not? Then, gingerly, like he'd crumble into dust if I moved too quickly, I eased the bandana off of his head, exposing his matted brown curls to the candlelight. I ran my fingers through his dark hair to move the loose strands that clung stubbornly to his forehead, and I laughed again as I parted it neatly to the left side, like Mom used to when we were little kids. He hated how it looked- which, obviously, meant that it was my sacred duty as his sibling to love it. To be honest, I agreed with him- he looked like a cross between Donald Trump and one of those snotty little know-it-all kids from Barney. That's why he started wearing the purple bandana on his head in the first place- "to protect his masculinity", as he so often put it. I never mentioned that wearing purple wasn't exactly helping in that department.

The tears welling up in my eyes refused to fall, and my hands shook violently when I finally took them away. I pressed them against the floor to steady myself, and I even tried to dig my nails into it, like I would float away if I didn't have something solid to hold onto. They sunk into it like it was made of butter, and I jerked my hand back instinctively, cradling it protectively to my chest. I hadn't cut my nails for a while, sure, but come on! It wasn't like I transformed into Wolverine overnight.

That was when I knew for certain that I had gone off the deep end, but I couldn't care less. That was just a new motive to hurt the witch. Not that I needed any more, seeing as my compilation already made Santa's List look like a forgotten post-it note in comparison.

There were footsteps behind me, but that's kind of an understatement. It sounded like an entire stampede was blowing through the room, and I covered my ears as the sound bounced off the walls and became louder... and louder... and louder still. I then realized that it wasn't just the echo amplifying the sound; whoever was running through the room was closing in. In fact, they were right behind me. How did I know? Well, call it a lucky guess if you'd like, but it's kind of hard to ignore when their hands wrap around your throat and try to cut off your air supply. I gasped at the burning sensation, feeling like someone had dumped an extra-strength bottle of Germ-Ex on my already-reopened wound. The world began to distort before my eyes, and it made me think of when I was a toddler and used to spin in circles for minutes at a time until I eventually toppled ungracefully to the floor, unable to keep my balance. The only difference was that this time I wasn't laughing.

What little air I had left in my lungs I used to cough, and I began clawing at the cold, bony hands, trying to get free from their grasp. I struggled frantically between gasps for air, kicking, punching, lurching forward, but this dude was determined not to let me go- I'll give him that much. Well, it turns out it wasn't a guy. From the corner of my eye, I saw a flash of a perfectly styled blonde curl. That was all I needed to make me go Incredible Hulk on her. I stopped flopping around like a fish out of water, and instead took a hold of Vivian's hands, wrenched them apart like she wasn't even trying, and tossed her effortlessly to the side, where she landed with an almost imperceptible _oof_. I smiled and strolled to her side casually with every intention of dismembering her limb from limb until she begged me to finish her off. Pretty macabre, huh? Like I said, I was officially a nutcase.

The Witch Princess scrambled to stand up before I could reach her, but I was faster. I grabbed her by the neck and shoved her head roughly to the floor. She let out a pained sob, but continued to struggle futilely, like a mouse with its tail caught in a trap. I wasn't just smiling anymore. I was laughing triumphantly.

And then, something changed. My hands weren't clamped around smooth, pale skin anymore- it was darker, and rougher, more calloused. Her hair seemed to retract right back into her head, but not all the way- there were still a few inches left, even if it had turned the color of milk chocolate. Her flowing black robes were no more; in their place was a dark vest over a white button-up undershirt. Worst of all, I watched as her scarlet irises began to fade into a deep, rich brown, the pain and hopelessness and fear still present in their expression.

I was no longer fighting Vivian. I was fighting my brother. My... _dead_ brother?

I blinked, not sure whether I should hug him or run away screaming about a Zombie Apocalypse. Removing my hands from his neck would probably be a good start. I think he'd vote for that option, too, if he wasn't busy gulping the air like it was a scarce commodity. I glanced quizzically to the right, and sure enough, Kai's body wasn't there. At least that eliminated the "someone-call-the-Ghost-busters-I'm-being-haunted" option.

"As much as I hate breaking up sappy, heart-wrenching family reunions..."

I stiffened, and it wasn't because I was shocked to hear the familiar, shrill voice. I literally couldn't move. I don't think Kai could, either; he'd finally stopped flailing around like a lunatic. That was my fault to begin with, sure, but I had to admit that he looked funny doing so. Leave it to me to think of that when my brother just rose from the grave.

"Just thought I'd give you two little _angels_ a taste of what I can do. Just in case," she said, smiling like she just won the lottery. No, scratch that- it was too creepy to be genuine joy. It was more like the expression someone would be sporting if they decided to kick a terminally-ill, recently-orphaned puppy simply because they were bored.

"Did you kill my brother or not?" I managed to choke out. My throat burned. And my neck... forget about it. For a second there, I'd forgotten that I'd almost been strangled, too.

"Isn't it _obvious?_" Vivian huffed, crossing her arms in one fluid, pouting movement. "It was all an illusion! A mirage! _Fake! _Duh! You're even dumber than I thought- I've gotta admit that I'm disappointed! How you managed to evade me for so long is beyond even _me_. Of course, you don't have your little boyfriend to protect you now. Just little mister Boyardee here."

"Up...yours..." Kai croaked, his voice sounding so gravelly that I could barely make out the words. I nodded in agreement nonetheless. It was amazing how much two of the simplest words in the English dictionary could sum up your feelings in one go.

"What's wrong, little boy? Cat got your tongue?" Vivian asked with a malicious grin. She then gave a delicate little gasp and pressed a finger to her chin in astonishment, like she'd remembered something important. "Oh, wait a second! That was just your _beloved_ _sister_ trying to strangle the life out of you!"

"_You witch!_" Kai yelled accusingly, resulting in a violent coughing fit that broke up his next words. "She...wouldn't... do that!"

"You admitted it yourself!" I agreed angrily, determined not to let my voice waver. "It was an illusion. You... I don't know... _bewitched_ us, or something!"

"Hey, you're the one who's tossing the word around, not me," she shrugged and nonchalantly leaned against the cold stone wall that I'd walked through just minutes ago with a smug smile. "I didn't force you to do anything you didn't want to do. I didn't possess you. I just made you see things a little differently, is all. And, who knows? Maybe that's the way things _really_ are."

"Are you senile?" I screamed. "You tell me that all of that was an illusion, and now you say that it was the truth? What the hell! Is this some kind of sick joke? What do you think this is, Alice in Wonderland?"

"Reality isn't always what it seems."

"Oh yeah? Well, it doesn't help when Sabrina the Middle-Aged Witch starts screwing with your head!"

"Hmph. You do realized that I'm trying to help you, right?"

Vivian was no longer on the far side of the room. In what seemingly took no time at all, she was suddenly making a slow circle around me and my brother, her high-heels clicking loudly against the stone floor with each labored step.

"You _do _realize that I'm not the real enemy here?"

With one last step, she stopped her endless pacing, and instantly turned on her heel to face us. Her platinum hair billowed slightly in a nonexistent breeze, along with her dark, flowing robe, which left a trail behind her wake like a gaudy wedding train. Her lips steadily began to turn up at the corners until she was barring her unnaturally white teeth in a sharp, menacing smile.

I felt a tug at my battered jeans as Kai began to pull himself to his feet, eyes crinkled slightly in pain. Huh. I guess we could move now? I briefly considered going for the Princess, but discarded the idea with a scowl. Kai needed me right now; I couldn't risk getting even more injured, or else I couldn't help him at all. The Witch Princess knew it, too; it was like she was taunting me with the idea, giving me just enough leash to provoke me, but not enough to let me do anything with it. With a sigh, I offered Kai my hand, and he took it gratefully, not letting go even after he was standing on his own. It's not like I would've let go, anyway; his knees were knocking together so loudly that I'm sure the neighboring city was preparing for a magnitude nine earthquake. Kai squeezed my hand reassuringly, but it wasn't like I needed any reassurance in the first place. He never seemed to understand that, him being the big brother and all, but I'll admit that this protectiveness did provide a sense of comfort. It wasn't because it made me feel safe, but more because I knew that at least I knew that I wouldn't have to go through this alone, as bad as that sounds. I guess it's true what they say- misery loves company.

The Witch Princess swiveled her head back toward the strange wall, the horrific grin never wavering. If anything, it seemed to grow larger- especially as a dark figure emerged, seemingly from the formerly-solid slab of stone. The flickering candlelight masked his face, allowing only a fleeting glimpse every few seconds, but I didn't need any light to know who it was. His graceful steps were so light that they hardly made a sound, and his silvery hair peeked out from under his dark hooded robe, sort of like the hazy image of the moon that you see just before twilight.

He came to a halt at Vivian's side, his bright green eyes studying us from the shadow of his hood. They lingered for just a moment on our intertwined fingers, almost longingly, before he turned his head a little to glance at the woman beside him. She gave a quick nod, and an brief, amused laugh to go along with it. The cloaked figure took another step toward us, and Kai tried to push me behind him like a little kid. Ha! If only he knew! Like I'd ever be afraid of _this_ guy. In fact, I was pretty angry with him, if I remember correctly. I pushed Kai back instead, and he just sighed, knowing he couldn't win this battle- or any other one, for that matter.

"Go to hell!" I growled, taking a step forward to meet him halfway. Kai seized my arm and I shot him a dirty look, but decided not to risk hurting him even more. Goddess, why did all men have to be so accident prone?

"Ah. Nice to make your acquaintance once more as well, dearest Pony. I'm afraid, however, that you've already beaten me to it. That look that you are currently sporting, while quite becoming on such a lovely face as yours, could surely only been acquired from the lowest depths of hell- and from Satan himself, of course. I'm assuming, therefore, that you already know who I am. Good. Then there is no need to waste any time on formalities on your part," the figure purred, not missing a beat throughout. He gently pushed back his hood, and shook any loose silvery strands that remained captured in its folds. He shifted his burning yet calm gaze to Kai, eyes calculating as he blatantly sized him up. He then lowered himself into a smooth, flawless bow. "We, however, have yet to become properly acquainted. Allow me to introduce myself- not that I need an introduction, I'm sure. However, for politeness' sake, you may call me Phantom Skye, the one and only Prince of the Stars."

"Aren't you forgetting something?" Vivian questioned, reaching forward to take his pale hand. He obliged, allowing her rest her head gingerly on his shoulder, greasy blonde hair spilling over his chest. He rested his free hand on her head, the tips barely ghosting over her curls.

"Why of course, dearest. How rude of me," Skye added silkily. Her answering grin took up nearly half of her entire face, and she shook free of his grasp, seemingly to get a better look at me. This couldn't be good. "Allow me to formally introduce my bride-to-be, the Witch Princess Vivian."


	21. Chapter 21: Shame

**A/N: Well, this was originally supposed to be published by Christmas, but I guess New Year's isn't so bad either, right? ;) It was finished and ready to go by the original date, but I still haven't heard anything from my beta, so it's up to me to do all the editing for the time being. It doesn't help that I like to read pretty fast, so I had to go through the thing maybe ten or fifteen times before I stopped finding typos (Again, I blame Wordpad and its appalling lack of a spell check!)! **

**It _is_ nice to have a second opinion though (not to mention a faster editor than yours truly XD), so if there's anyone out there who'd be willing to beta for me for the remaining chapters, that would be amazing!**

First came the surprise. I just sort of stood there, my brain never fully registering what I'd just heard and what I was seeing, even though it was right smack in front of my face. I kind of squinted at the pair, trying to interpret the words that just didn't make any sense in their current order. There was something off about them. Something... _wrong. _Vivian... someone's fiance? That part was messed up enough in itself, but _Skye's_ fiance... Huh... That was not only enough to give someone a serious aneurysm, but also make them a little nauseous. Myself not excluded.

Next, it was betrayal. Yeah, yeah, I know what you're thinking- how sweet, Pony's in love, yadda yadda yadda. Well, that's all a load of bullcrap, if you ask me. No offense. You don't necessarily have to be in love to feel betrayed, you know. At least, not in the mushy, lovey-dovey kind of way. I'd known Skye for a while now, and while I wouldn't go as far as to say that I "loved" him, I'd actually come to- well, tolerate him, I guess. There- I said it. Happy now? I. Trust. Skye. Big whoop!

Or maybe it would be better to say that I trust_ed _him, seeing as I clearly couldn't anymore?

All those times he remarked about how "radiant" I looked bathed in the moonlight, or how he would impatiently count the minutes we were apart, or bragging about how he could easily spot me in a crowd of one thousand people- all for nothing. Each melodic laugh was a deceitful lie, each careful smile a predetermined ploy to disarm my suspicion. I'd been more than willing to commit homicide several times over because of those very same things, but still- I should've _known_. I should've seen this coming! Then again, what did I expect? Skye was, as Carter once put it so long ago, a "dirty, no-good, snake-in-the-grass thief". He wormed his way into my life, pulling just the right strings, saying just the right things to get my guard down- but it was all for what? For a temperamental witch in serious need of a padded room and straightjacket?

As if! Somehow, I had a hard time believing that. The way he interacted with her, the way he spoke- surely, he wasn't in love. He _couldn't_ be! It was all too _formal_. The way he talked to her was distant and cold, sort of like he'd rather be somewhere else- _anywhere_ else- but with her (and, frankly, I didn't blame him). His actions around her didn't come naturally, as they should; each movement was thoughtful, almost clumsy, like a child trying to balance on a bike without training wheels for the first time rather than a man madly in love (Assuming that you could call him a man. Honestly, you guys- the dude wears more leopard print than Snookie). Though Vivian seemed more than willing to hang all over him like a monkey with a nasty case of Restless Leg Syndrome, Skye seemed a bit more... I don't know... _reserved_. Even I could see that much in the way he never really made contact with her, like there was some magnetic force that wrenched him away from the Witch Princess in the same way that it drew her closer.

"Isn't it just _gorgeous?" _Vivian bragged, rushing forward to shove her bony hand in front of my face. While engagement rings are typically thought of as simple with a sort of subtle beauty, the gaudy thing could've easily been snatched off of Flava Flave's finger. Seriously, you guys- I'm talking Ring Pop status here. How tacky could you get? Skye probably stole the thing, anyways; I admit that it did give me a little satisfaction knowing that the ring wasn't really hers. But why would he go through so much trouble if he didn't actually want to be engaged to her in the first place?

_What if you're wrong? _some small part of me questioned. I quickly repressed the thought, but it was too late. What if I w_as _wrong? After all, how did I know what Skye acted like when he was in love? It was all an act, every bit of it. Did I really expect him to act that same way around the person he _really_ loved, if the first time around it was all for show?

He never bought _me _a ring. He never kissed _me_. He never even held my hand.

Then again, I never let him.

"Yeah, sure. Whatever," I said dully. She beamed proudly, her chin jutting up a fraction of an inch more. I was surprised her scrawny little toothpick-neck didn't snap in two at the motion. "But you're probably the only one it looks good on, to be honest. Next to you, I'd imagine that even Gustafa would begin to resemble Johnny Depp."

It could've just been a trick of the light, but I could've sworn that the teeniest of smiles appeared then on Skye's face. No, not the "I'm-The-Goddess's-Gift-To-Women" smile, but a real one. One that touched his eyes. But that was only for a second. After that, it was replaced with something resembling panic as the Princess scowled, her right hand drawing back behind her left shoulder as if she meant to-

"Down!" Kai hissed from behind me, firmly grasping my shoulders in his hands. I admit that I startled a little, forgetting that he was even there, but it was quickly overtaken by panic as I was thrown roughly to the side. My body may have been in bad shape but- as bad as this sounds- I was almost used to the pain by now. It wasn't exactly a new thing when my cheek grazed the stone, sending a small but annoying burning sensation up the side of my face. In fact, my first thought was whether or not I chipped a tooth.

I mumbled a few choice words as I scrambled to find my footing again, only to be hit with the worst wave of vertigo I've ever felt in my life. The world swam before my eyes, like it was a watercolor painting that hadn't had the chance to dry yet. I braced myself to hit the ground yet again- only to stop midfall as a hand slipped into mine and jerked me back to my feet. I shook my head to clear it, and then shook my hand free of Skye's with a mixture of surprise and disgust at the contact. It was then, however, that I discovered that unwanted physical contact and the possible acquisition of cooties was the least of my problems.

To put things simply, the world had frozen. The Witch Princess's mouth was open, a scowl on her face as she began to growl something at Kai- but did you expect anything different from her? Her fingertips sparked at the tips with an eerie red light, and I quickly moved to scream at my brother to move before he went and got his head exploded, but he just sort of stood there, arms crossed defiantly, though I saw that he had one eye worriedly trained on the spot where I used to lay. I would've been touched if I hadn't been gawking at the scene like a deer that spotted Vivian's ring reflecting the full glare of the sun.

"Wha-?" I began, but was cut off as Skye pressed a finger to my lips in a gesture of silence. A bead of sweat trickled down his pale forehead against a sort of invisible strain, and he firmly took both of my hands in his, ignoring my sputtered protests and weak attempts to shake him off again. His hands were cold, and clammy, but nonetheless he grasped onto mine as if he was drowning, and like he would somehow die then and there if he let go.

"_Listen to me_," he said, he voice containing such force that I shut up immediately, but I still narrowed my eyes to make sure he knew I wasn't proud of it. He lowered himself a few inches so that he was looking me straight in the eyes, and it was then that I knew that I was right all along. He _wasn't_ in love with the Witch Princess. For whatever reason, he was in love with _me_, and it wasn't just a whim, or even infatuation as I thought for so long. Somehow- somewhere along the way- it turned into something _real_. Goddess, if men didn't stop falling in love with me soon then I'd have to go get a sickle upgrade from the blacksmith's just to fend them all off. "Time is of the essence, so you must listen closely. You are to do everything that Vivian tells you. Everything- do you understand? I do not _care_ if it is stupid. I do not _care_ if it seems pointless. I. Don't. Care. Even if she hands you a gun and instructs you to shoot me, you _will_ comply, and it will be without a second thought and with a pleasant smile on your face. Do you hear me? This is _not_ a request."

"If it comes down to it, I'll make sure it's through the heart," I mumbled, recalling one of our earlier conversations. It seemed like ages ago, but even so I managed a half-smile, not really wanting to take the conversation seriously despite his tone. "Much more dramatic, remember?"

His light green eyes glittered with grim amusement. "Heh. Yes, I remember. It will be a death for the history books, will it not? Perhaps we shall make Romeo and Juliet bow their heads in shame."

I snorted. "Bow their heads in shame my ass. We'll make 'em look like one of those cheesy Hallmark movies."

A light chuckle escaped his lips, and he freed one of his hands to ruffle my bird's nest of a ponytail playfully. I grimaced at the simple gesture not only because- well, because he was actually _touching _me and his face had yet to be wedged halfway inside of his skull, but I guess I also had a bruise or knot of some sort on my head, too. Figures. If I didn't stop adding to the number of bruises on my body, then I'd look like Barney the Dinosaur's twin sister by tomorrow night.

Out of the corner of my eye, I could've sworn I saw something move. Curiously, I peered over Skye's shoulder and realized that, slowly but surely, time was beginning to pass again outside of our little bubble. Probably not the best news in the world for my dumb brother, who was standing within toasting distance of an angry witch's personal fireworks display- but hey, what can you do? Upon seeing my expression, Skye whirled around to survey the area behind him- and he was clearly not happy with what he saw. His posture was rigid as he turned back to face me, grim determination easily read on his face.

"I _will _get you out of this mess," he said. There was something about the way he said "you" and not "us" that sent cold shivers down my spine. I may not have had a heart of gold, but I had a heart nonetheless. It kind of made me a little sad the way he spoke, as if I'd be the only one getting out of this thing alive- but just a little, mind you. "I give you not only my honor as a thief in this promise, but my heart as well. I only ask that you not crush it into a million indiscernible pieces and scatter them in the breeze."

Did he really think that was something I'd do? Ouch. I wasn't cruel... well, _that_ cruel anyhow. On occasion, maybe... but not often...

Okay, swallowing my pride for the moment, I was pretty much the biggest jerk to ever walk the face of the planet.

But still- _ouch._

"Oh, sure. I can't break your heart- just put a bullet through it, right?" I snapped, an intended edge of bitterness sharpening my words like a blade. Caught up in the moment, I didn't realize that I was inching closer and closer to his face until the tip of my nose collided harshly with his. My heart seemed to stutter a moment in surprise, but it was too late to stop now. I continued as if it never happened, my thoughts drifting back to my anger. "Because, apparently, you can see the future now along with doing _whatever the hell this is-_ not that I'd know, seeing as I'm obviously just a lowly farmer- albeit a lousy one- and not worthy of an explanation. Thanks a lot, Skye. Good to know that you think so highly of me."

With a sigh, Skye ran the fingers of his free hand through his thin hair, which was sheened with sweat in the flickering candlelight. He glanced somewhat nervously back at the other two before his eyes met mine again, and he bit his lip for a moment before attempting a reply.

"Pony, perhaps we should continue this conversation another-"

"Shut _up, _Skye! For Goddess's sake, shut up! I don't _care_, alright? I just don't. Let them see us. Let them hear us, too, for all I care! And you know why? Because you're a coward, and you deserve it! Tricking the Witch Princess into loving you just to save your own skin- what a pansy move! Don't you _dare_ argue with me unless you want to lose a limb; you know it's true, what other reason could you have? And who could forget you swapping spit with Vivian while, meanwhile, five feet away, I was losing enough blood to give the White House a new paint job? Not me, I can tell you that much right now! That hurt, you know. A lot. Not just the gash the size of the Rio Grande on my neck, but also the gnarly-looking one on my back _from where you stabbed it. _'Hey, Pony- I love you! Now let me go get engaged to another woman who's trying to kill you and possibly also steal your soul- but we're still cool, right?' Hah! And you think you're such a ladies' man! What a loser!"

"Please at least allow me to expla-"

"You know what? _No. _You had your chance to give me a straight answer, but you would always skirt around the question like this is some kind of game. Like I'm some kind of pawn in your game- perfectly expendable and practically useless, but fun to toy around with, or to use to test your opponent's defenses without placing yourself in the line of fire. What did you used to call this? 'Keeping the mystique in our relationship'? News flash, Prince of the Stars- what you call mystique, every sentient being on this planet calls vanity. You purposefully withhold information with the sole, greedy intent of protecting yourself- like not telling me why the hell I'm here instead of watching TV at home like a normal person just so I can't go blabbing to your little girlfriend about your plans. That's it, isn't it? You don't trust me! You're too scared to trust anyone other than yourself, because you're the very image of perfect, right? All must bow to the mighty Phantom Thief, who's so confident in his ability to overcome poor, defenseless girls that he leaves a note in advance to warn them of their impending doom. How generous you must think you are, giving each victim time to prepare! How _thoughtful _you are! And to think that you have warrants out all over the country for your arrest, despite this unconditional generosity? Woe is you! Fate can be so cruel, can't it?"

"That it can," he whispered so softly that even_ I _had trouble hearing him. That's saying something- if I was an inch closer to him, then we'd occupy the same space. His eyes were closed then, and when he opened them they were full of such ancient and genuine sadness that, for a moment, I almost felt pity for him. That was short-lived, however, as I realized that that was probably what he wanted- a pity party. I narrowed my eyes again and jabbed a finger into his chest. It was kind of ineffective because, though I forced him back, I continued to follow him at such a close proximity that I could feel his heart hammering in his chest.

"And there you go. Proving my point," I said dryly, the anger settling a little but still outlining my words. Out of spite, I jabbed my finger into his chest again, and again, using the tactic to accent each of my points. "Thinking that your life is _so-ooo_ bad, even when looking me in the eyes and seeing just how miserable, and lost, and pretty much devoid of hope I am right now. You probably don't even think I have emotions, do you? Well, you're wrong- bet you don't even think that it's possible for His Highness to be capable of such an imperfection, but it is, trust me. I'm human, alright? I'll admit to that much. I have skin, and bones, and hair, and even a heart- a living, beating heart. I'm not just some character in The Wizard of Oz, trying to find some magician to snap his fingers and make me feel whole again. Can you _believe_ that?"

At this point, I had run out of room to push him. He literally had his back against the wall (and not the weird one, thankfully). I snatched his free hand with both of mine and roughly placed it on my chest, where my pulse was almost as fast as his. And before you even think it- no, I wasn't in love with the prat- of course not, what kind of idiot do you take me for? Not that I'm implying I'd really recognize what being in love felt like granted that I was- well, _me_. But what I _did_ know was that a person in love didn't think of new and creative ways to kill or harm their significant other in their free time. It didn't matter if you could read them like a book, or maybe possibly not mind just a teensy bit when they threw a compliment your way every now and then. As long as that burning hatred was there, there simply couldn't be love- right? There wasn't room for both, sort of like how you can't make a sandwich with both Miracle Whip _and _mayonnaise. It's just not right.

Right. Therefore the reason my heart was pounding like a song with too much bass was _not _because I was in love at all. Nope. Duh. I'm more of the in-your-face, direct type, so you'd definitely be able to tell if I was lying. And I totally wasn't, just so you know.

But, see, I had this crazy idea. It would be so humiliating that I'd probably have to start wearing a grocery bag over my head for the next year or so just to hide my shame, but it would hopefully get my point across. Maybe Skye would even stop looking like he wanted to slash his wrists to shreds and start, I dunno, planning an escape route rather than his impending doom. Before I lost my nerve, I planted hands firmly on either side of his head, enjoying his bewildered expression as I did so. I admit that I may have smirked a little, enjoying it a little more than I should've.

And then, lightly, not touching him any more than I could help, I planted a swift kiss on his cheek.

I backpedaled as fast as I could afterwards, wanting to be as far from the delirious-looking pretty boy as I possibly could. My last sight before I tripped was of his hand cupped over the side of his face, like he wanted to preserve the feel of my lips on his cheek. His eyes were wide and unseeing, but the burden that he seemed to be carrying previously was gone. He looked the happiest I think I'd ever seen him. What a sap!

But, like I said, I tripped. I seemed to be doing that a lot lately, now that I think of it. Over what? Call it irony, or karma, or whatever you like, but what I tripped over was none other than Vivian's high-heeled foot. Luckily for me, she was back to the Vivian that we all know and love, mobile and unfrozen body and all, and was able to heroically stop my fall by freezing me in mid-air. Now _I_ was the one who couldn't move, and, to tell you the truth, I much preferred it the other way around. At least she wasn't going to disintegrate my brother now- at least, not for a while. Instead, she was probably going to do the same to me first. Yay?

"Where did _you _come from?" I heard her shrill voice question. I tried to shrug, but once again I was frozen solid, hovering in mid-air with my nose to the stone floor. I opened my mouth to say something, but Kai answered before I did.

"Well, Vivian dear, when a mommy and a daddy love each other very much..."

"Do you _ever _shut _up?_" the witch snapped. Suddenly, I was on my feet again, staring into her burning scarlet irises. "Does he _ever _shut up?"

"No," I replied simply. "But don't worry- he's got nothing on your _fiance_."

As if in remembrance, the Witch Princess glanced down at her ring and then at Skye, who had silently resumed his position at her side without anyone but me noticing his absence. His hood cloaked his expression, but I noticed that he seemed unusually still. She sent a toothy grin his way, but he did nothing it response other than nod curtly. This seemed good enough for Vivian, who gleefully twirled around to face me again, victory written all over her pointed features.

"Fiance," she said. Her answering grin was so large and tacky that even plastic surgery couldn't replicate it. I'm pretty sure I could count every one of her teeth without a problem. "That does have a nice ring to it, doesn't it darling?"

Again, Skye nodded. Vivian seemed delighted, thinking he was still playing the quiet game, trying to prove me wrong. Staring at his face, cloaked in shadow, I wondered if that was really it. Maybe I got through to him after all- who knows?

She snatched up one of his hands and held it tightly in hers, his arm hanging somewhat limply nonetheless like a dead weight as she dragged him towards what I had by now figured out was the "entrance".

"Come along,_ fiance!_" she sang tauntingly, catching my eye and holding it as she skipped. As Skye was tugged along like a shackled convict, I could've sworn that I saw him making a sideways "L" gesture near his chest that looked startlingly similar to a gun. His hood slipped a bit, and before he disappeared through the wall I caught a glimpse of a smug-looking grin. I returned as I caught his eye without really meaning to.

When they were finally gone, I watched as Kai strode over to where the invisible door used to be. He drew back his fist as he meant to punch through the wall, but it met solid concrete once again. He inhaled through his teeth loudly, cradling his probably messed-up hand to his chest. A few seconds later, he simply closed his eyes, shook his head in disbelief, and slunk to the ground with his back against the stone.

"Well, I'm fresh outta ideas," he sighed. "Anything on your end?"

"No. I've got nothing," I replied honestly, my thoughts drifting back to Skye's words. _I _will _get you out of this mess. _He seemed pretty convincing, despite the hopelessness that I think was mutual between me and Kai. Apparently, _I_ was getting out of this mess- but what about my brother? And what about my- well, whatever the hell Skye was? As I looked into my brother's dark brown eyes, I realized something: without him and Skye, I'd really have nothing to live for. What would be the point? I'd have no one to make me laugh, or to bully when I was feeling a little down or just irritated in general. There'd be no one to cheer me up when I got fed up with the whole farming deal- or, now that I think of it, to farm for me whenever possible- and no one to cook for me so that the things I'm supposed to put in my mouth aren't poisonous or alive (I'm not sure if you've ever seen my cooking before, but I'll tell you now that I think it'd give Rachael Ray a heart attack). And so, with that thought, I made a promise to myself, to Kai, and even to the infamous Phantom Thief, who was so determined to turn this into a suicide mission that he managed to stop time to tell me so. "But I do know one thing: I _will _get us out of this mess."


End file.
